The World Revolved Around Me

The crash didn't seem that bad at first. It was actually, I just wasn't hurt. I was driving drunk, or maybe Billy was driving drunk. I don't really know. The point is we were both drunk and the car crashed. I can't remember much about the accident. I don't think I was conscious for the crash. I do remember what happed afterwards. There was blood, broken glass, burnt rubber, and roses. Lots of roses. We had crashed into a rose garden.

I woke up and found a rosebud sticking through my window. I felt ok, shaky, but otherwise all right. I guess I just fainted, or passed out drunk, again I don't know. But the details are coming back now. I leaned over to check on Billy. His face was sticky with blood. He had hit his head on the steering wheel. I remember now. Billy had been driving

There was a lot of blood, and he wasn't moving. I sobered up pretty quickly. His hair was matted down with blood. Billy had such beautiful hair. His eyes were closed, suddenly I needed to see his eyes, I needed him to look back at me. I checked for a pulse. I don't know how to check for a pulse and I couldn't find one. But I just moved my hand a bit, and there it was. I heard a gasping squeak. That was me.

The blood was pounding in my ears and I was gasping in relief. Than I noticed that the pounding in my head was going a lot faster than the blood pumping through his veins. And I could feel it slow. Slow . . . slow . . . slow. Than it was gone.

I vomited on the dashboard. I don't remember how I got out of the car. But suddenly I was pulling Billy out of the car, and pounding on his chest, and breathing into his mouth. He tasted like blood and tears. I felt for a pulse, nothing. I moved my hand, nothing. I vomited into the roses. I pushed on this chest, harder this time. I felt one of his ribs crack. I don't know how long I tried to bring Billy around, but he never came back to me.

I was on my hands and knees moaning. I clawed at the ground with one hand and held Billy's fingers with the other. The roses were all rotating around me. Tears and Billy's blood streaked dripped down my face. Blood and vomit stained my clothes. And there were roses everywhere. It all began to blur. I was nauseous. My chest was tight. Everything spun around me. And I couldn't breathe, I thought, I hoped I would die with Billy. But I didn't. I just knelt there, holding Billy's hand as the world revolved around me.

(does the title make sense?)