(12-5-05)Numb-

I feel like crying but there's no tears

I feel like screaming and I've lost my voice

I can't feel the pain that's surrounding me

I'm watching people in despair and I just stare

I'm sitting in a puddle of nothingness

All my feelings confused-Numb

Overwhelmed by nothing and yet its everything

Something so unexpected…His smile is gone

I feel- I don't feel

I don't know how to react to the incident

It doesn't even feel like reality

It's like a dream I can't wake up from

It's as if I'm somewhere I'm not supposed to be

This Nightmare can't be real…

I need to wake up, to feel it all

It needs to be fake

I just don't know how to understand

Is he really dead?

The world around me doesn't feel right

It feels…Numb- unsure of anything and everything

Numb- the absence of feeling

Like a sheet of ice just waiting to crack

Disaster just a step away and there's no way to stop it

How do you respond to this kind of situation?

What are you supposed to do next?

Is it okay to laugh or is that disrespectful?

Do you choose to forget and move on

or remember and suffer forever?

There are no answers to my questions

It's as if I were speaking to the wind

I don't know what to feel…

I don't think I'm feeling anything at all

The world is spinning but I'm standing still

Watching it go past me…I don't feel dizzy

I feel numb