Maybe

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Maybe you'll say you still want me
Maybe you'll say that don't
Maybe we said it was over
Maybe I can't let you go

My heart still stops when you walk into the room. Hell, it skips a beat when I go past your room. It's funny how something like a room can hold so many memories. We had our first kiss in that room. I realized how much I truly loved you in that room.

But we broke up. Not in the room, of course, nothing bad ever happened in that room. Not with you. There's just something about that damn room, every time I go past it, I realize how much I still miss you. And then I see you, and I realize how much I still love you.

And then, then you hang out the window yelling to me as I come up to the building, run up front to tease me, to say hi to me, just to mess around with me. You come to the back later, when you have a minute, just to throw me over your shoulder and spin me until I can't see straight, and I certainly can't stand on my own. Someone yells for you, there's always someone yelling for you, everyone always wants you. And you smack my tush, wink, and run off to your adoring audience.

And that's what they are. They're an audience. You live in a world where you are constantly on center stage, amusing and entertaining them. You are the center of everything, and you truly look like you enjoy it.

Sometimes, though, I wonder if you do. When it's quiet and we're alone locked in your room. That damn room, it's the center of our relationship. But those times, when we're quiet and you're just sitting there, and I'm just watching you, you look like you belong here. In the quiet, the mellow moments where it's not about anyone. Where it's about just existing, quietly, yourself.

I could look at you, watch the way the shadows of the fire light played across your face, and feel this amazing peace. It was this feeling like everything was ok, and it always would be, because you were there. And it's funny, even now that we're not 'together', I still get that feeling with you. I feel safe with you, you will never leave me. Not if I need you. You promised me you would always stay with me, and you never break promises. You don't even make them if you're not sure you'll keep them. That's another thing I love about you.

God, I just love every last inch of you. I love your smile, your sweetness, your patience, your passion. I love your laugh, your temper, your protectiveness. I love you.

There's not a thing in this world that could make me want to change you. You are perfect just the way you are. Valar, you drive me insane sometimes, but it's part of your charm. It's part of why I fell in love with you in the first place, for the way you treated me, the way you acted around me.

So now I have to tell you. I have to tell you that I love you, and that I miss you so bad it hurts to breathe, knowing that I don't have you. And then, well...Then, the ball is in your court.

Maybe you'll say you still want me
Maybe you'll say that don't
Maybe we said it was over
Baby, I can't let you go