laced with nitroglycerin

with a smile draped on my face (covering
my pain and the shame of the scars across
my body), your name dripped from my lips.
each letter was laced with nitroglycerin as i
admitted who caused this all (and she stared
at me, hiding shock obvious in her eyes).

and maybe after admitting this enough,
i'll find myself truly happy once again.

------

author's note: the 'she' mentioned is my step-mom. i told her because she asked why i was still doing it to myself.