A/N: This is the product of a party of ours... ahem. Yeah. That's really all there is to be said. If it makes little or no sense... well, it was never meant to.

TEH OPERA

Characters

Cortavio

Straight but wants to be gay

Italian French man

On a ship

Getting out stripping biz

Stowing away, pretends to work on boat

Met Lady Andrew at a strip club in Istanbul

Sailing to the holy land to claim the drug traffic for France

Speaks only French

"Ginger /snap/" is his nickname from L.A.

Sir Frankalot

Canadian beef master

Gay ship captain

In love with cortavio

From gay ghettos of Quebec

Smuggles drugs in beef

An alchoholic

Too drunk to notice

Lady Andrew

Transvestite

& cross-dresser

Guy masquerading as a girl

Cortavio is in love w/ Lady Andrew

MIDGET

The Muscle

Frankalot's body guard

Glares at everyone

Has no personality

ROCKY

Responds well to compliments about muscles

Tries to seduce Lady Andrew

Omg there's a PLOT?!

The spaces are time lapses in which we never figured out what would happen...

-They get on the fucking boat and they meet. (Sir Frankalot is WASTED.)

-Lady Andrew and Sir Frankalot duel over Cortavio. Frankalot cuts Andrew's clothes off and it is revealed that she is a he! (During sex in the past, Cortavio and LA were so wasted, cortavio didn't notice that LA was a man.)

-Cortavio and Frankalot fall in love

-Lady Andrew and Muscle fall in love

-everyone dies when police raid ship in a drug bust

-POLICE ALL GET HIGH!!!