Just Me, A Nice Way To Be?

I wish my fucking head
Was as clear to me
As all the things you know that you
don't want.
And I wish my ugly heart
Was as empty
As my eyes seem, when I see them
in the mirror,
And if I could change one thing,
I wouldn't wish
that I wasn't lying here, crying here,
on the floor,
I wouldn't wish
that I could be with you, lie with
you forever,
I would wish to be alone
Where I couldn't hurt
Where I could just exist,
Be alive,
Without living.