Before we get to the introduction, I'd like to take this time to do a quick disclaimer. This is my first story for fiction press, and it's a work in progress. It's in a journal-like format. Themes are taken from my life, and from the lives of close friends, but everything is fictional and edited for the purpose of this story. This contains some explicit language and sensual themes. Content includes homosexuality, so if you have a problem with lesbians, stop reading now. I'd appreciate it if you R/R, because I don't know if this story is any good. Continuance in writing could heavily depend on feedback. Please, if your only criticism is the fact that there are many gay issues presented in this story, don't bother reviewing. Constructive criticism is greatly appreciated, but gay bashing is not. I hope this story proves interesting, and if you have any suggestions, just let me know! Thanks.

I chose the names of my characters very carefully. I'll update this as new characters are introduced. Here's a list of the characters so far, and meanings of their names. EDIT: There's a lot of characters, though some play minor roles in my story. For now, I'm going to italicize the main characters.

Jacqueline Jetta: "to protect"; "black gem". Nicknames: JJ, Jetta.
Demi May: "small"; "bitter heart". Nickname: Demon. The main character doesn't like her very much as you can tell by the nickname. Haha.
Angelina Bell: "little angel"; "beauty". Nicknames: Angel, Lina, Bell.
Amora Sakura: "love"; "cherry blossom". Nicknames: Love, Sake (pronounced sah-key). Sake just so happens to be an alcoholic Japanese beverage. This is the narrator.
Ha: "sunshine and warmth". Named this because she always seems to bring sunshine and warmth...that is, until she doesn't get her way, in which case watch out.
Heather: "a flowering plant". That doesn't really fit her personality, so the narrator calls her Heath, meaning "destroyer".
Sheridan Oprah: "wild"; "runaway". Nickname: Sher
Lassie Eilis: "young girl, maiden"; "noble, kind". Nickname: Lass
Megan Alma: "soft and gentle"; "soul". She is called by both her first and middle names.
Misha Tana: "from the name Michael which means 'Who is like God?'"; "fairy queen". She's constantly attacking the idea of faith and God and Christianity etc. Plus, she's more than a little... eccentric... so the fairy queen part sums her up nicely. I love the girl she's based off of and I'm sure you'll enjoy her crazy character.
Shima Aimi: "mother"; "love, beauty". She is Misha's twin sister, but born a minute earlier and inheriting the more maternal qualities. Generally more grounded than her sister, she has an earthy quality that adds to her subtle beauty. The twins collectively are referred to as S&M. (giggle of course that isn't a play on anything... suppresses laughter)
Lucy Inessa: "bringer of light"; "chaste, meek". Nickname: Inez; she is usually called Lucy except by close friends who occasionally call her Inez. She always "sheds light" on various situations. Though part of her name says meek, she's a very outgoing person. The chaste part is dead on though. She's a lovely girl.
Anita Lanassa: "gracious"; "cheerful". Nickname: Lana; Though, she is only called Lana by very close friends. She's the sweetest person you'll ever meet, except of course maybe Megan Alma. She's always happy—even when she's sad...and constantly trying to cheer people up. She's very shy, and takes just about everything personally.
Marcie Lane: "warlike"; "narrow". Well, let's just say that Marcie isn't always to be messed with. She's warlike—including casualties, secret plans and treaties, and nuclear bombs. She's narrow in that well, she's got a one track mind and once she's on a path it's hard to get her off it. She has quite an elaborate past with the main characters—as to be revealed in the story.

And now, the introduction:

She did it again today...she made my heart stop and my stomach flip...every now and then she still manages to take my breath away.

Hearing her talk to and about her girlfriend reminds me what it was like being in love with her.

Something I'd almost rather forget.

But, such is life when you're still best friends with your ex. and such is life when there's a constant internal struggle debating how you really feel about her. But, if you've ever had an ex, you know the feeling I'm talking about. I mean... love never really dies does it? At least, not real love. And I really loved her.

But you know, I think I'm still better off without her. Despite the adorable dyke she is at times, she really was a bitch to me. She broke my, she ripped my heart out and fucking fed it to the wolves.

But what does that really have to do with anything? Not much. You know, being a lesbian really isn't all it's cracked up to be... it's much less sometimes. The drama, the pain, the...drama. I mean really being gay is eighty percent drama and twenty percent liking the same sex.

And I've been doing a lot of thinking... I would not mind having a nice boyfriend. Would I rather have a girlfriend? Sure. But I could go for any sort of human contact right now. I want somebody to make my heart jump and I want to get butterflies in my stomach because of anyone...anyone but her.

This is a story about my life, my love, and all the drama that comes with being a lesbian.