she keeps a razorblade in her pocket as some
sort of comfort (it always haunts her) because
already, acid words sting and tear open tainted
flesh made by memories she would rather forget.
and she swallowed the lies and (broken) promises
as if they were sweet but only to realize that it was
cyanide she drank (tell me, why isn't she dead yet?).

and just to be cliché, she wears her heart on her sleeve
(on display, bloody, bruised, and with duct-tape all over).

she suffers silently because she doesn't want to be labeled
like so many others and she knows that they'll never know
what it's like to be trapped inside like her (because secretly,
she wants everything to come crashing down in an instant).

she's waiting for that certain someone to sweep her off
her feet as her eyes travel and hastily meet blue only
to quickly turn away (steal just a glance, please).
could (/will) he understand her like she needs?

she pats that pocket with an almost smile
across her face but disgust in her veins.

May 18, 2006


author's note: i actually, for once, really like this piece. it's loosely based on me & the other people like me who suffer. i wrote this actually, from inspiration that came in from a weird direction. apparently (as people claim) there is the 'wrong' way to cut (the 'emo' way) & a 'right' way (suicidal way).& apparently, the 'emo' way is just for attention. i find this very stupid and redundant. for one, who cares about the'emo' wayand the suicidal way?& whoever does it for attention is just plain stupid anyways. yes, now i can step off my soap box and stop shooting my bias opinion.

& this blue-eyed boy that is mentioned in the 2nd to last stanza very much so exists. i happen to see him in the hallways in my school and happen to see him glancing in my direction. i've had him in one of my classes for all of one trimester and i haven't realized until now how infatuated with him. it's crazy weird because i'll never see him again once school is over with. and those pretty blue eyes do exist as well.

sorry for the long author's note. i hope you enjoyed & please, review.