Coloring the Gray
As July was ending, it was the last day of July. What else was last? The sight of Violet Caberah. July 21st, Monday morning.
"Why do you look so sad, Willy?" Abril said, pouring me a cup of tea. "It's a beautiful July's day. . is it because schools prelims are gonna start again?" She laughed. I didn't laugh, but stare at the food. "I'm leaving for the Hague airport soon." I said simply. "Helping Violet pack."
"Oh.. where's she off to? Is it summer vacation?" Obliviously, my sister asked. I shook my head. "She's leaving." I said calmly. "She's going back to America."
"..Oh. I'm sorry, Willy.. if there's anything. . oh my god, she's leaving? Is she coming back?"
"I don't think so." I said again, with no obvious sadness in my voice. I stood up and went to the front door. "Diego and them are driving us."
"Alright, have fun.." Abril said.
I walked to Violet's house, and it seemed desolate already. There stood her aunt, crying as she saw her neice go. "Violet.." She said. "You've been a great help around here. Tell your papa I said thanks."
"Alright." Violet said quietly. "I'll be sure to tell him that." Allan was beside Violet, holding her hand. "Baby, we should get to the airport." The band members were standing around too. Violet shook her head, "I'm gonna go with friends."
"Alright. I'll see you there, Vio." Allan pecked her on the cheek.
As Allan left, Violet looked over to me with saddened eyes. "Hey William." She said softly. "Today's the big day."
"Yeah." I said. "Big day.. you're leaving, and
"I should get inside, so you two can talk." Her aunt said, going into the house.
So there we were, Violet and I stood infront of her porch, where I shared good memories with her.
"Heh. I'm gonna miss Amsterdam. Europe is truly beautiful."
I was gonna ask why she wanted to leave then. But I knew the answer, so there was no point in asking her. I nodded and said, "Yeah. It is beautiful. You should vacation here."
"Maybe." She said.
After that, Diego arrived. He and his bandmates carried Violet's boxes and bags into the van.
I can't believe she's leaving.
"Well. It's your choice to leave.."
"I'm sorry, William." She said.
I knew she wasn't. She had a choice. It was me, or it was Allan.
"Okay. Lets get to the Hague." Diego said. "Get in the van, you two."
With that, we got in the van.
The car ride was silent, Elizabeth was crying as we drove along.
"We just got to know each other, now you're leaving! Write me e-mails, Violet." Elizabeth said. "You better!"
"I will." Violet said sullenly. She just smiled, and hugged her new friend.
"So how's that record deal?" I asked, trying to break the silence.
"We've talked about it, all of us, including our parents, Elizabeth. And yes, we're being sent to New York. We talked to Louis yesterday. By the end of the summer." Diego said, driving along. "All of us, writing songs and photo shoots, and recording."
"Glad you got the life you've always wanted." Violet said. "I'll buy your cd when you get big."
"So you're not finishing grade 12?" I asked. "I'm gonna be alone, with Maria and Noel.. who am I left with now?" I complained. "They're horrible!"
"Our education will be part time in America." Diego said, smiling. "Although, us guys have to rent an apartment in New York City. So, it's gonna be rough for a few months."
"I'm happy for you." Violet said. "You have to call me when you arrive in America."
I wish I could say I was happy for her, too.
And I'm going to be alone, and that feeling.. I can't bear with it.
Diego was right.
I do need someone. I can't live without anyone else.
And I can't possibly bear the thought of her gone..
After driving for a long two hours, we arrived at the airport.
It was time.. to say goodbye. We took her luggage as they lined up to put it on the plane. Everyone was saying their goodbyes, and such. Crowding Violet and DI. Elizabeth was still crying, and then hugged Violet again.
"Nice meeting you." Diego said to Allan, shaking his hand. "It was an experience to perform with you guys." Allan nodded, and just let out a soft chuckle. He didn't say anything, then he turned to Violet. "I'll be checking out Duty Free for a second with Victor, I see this cologne I want." He laughed. Victor and Allan left, and the other band members were talking with Vechtersbazen members. Elizabeth was soon in the conversation..
Violet and I were just standing there, not saying another word.
I sat down, as did she.
"Violet, I'll miss you so much.." I said in a whisper. She looked over to me and sighed. "I'm sorry, William."
She led me on and she knew it.
"What do you really feel about me, Violet?" I said.
"I'm sorry I hurt you." She said.
Was she really sorry?
"What do you feel about me, Violet.." I said. "Do you hate me? Is that why you're leaving me?"
"I could never hate you, William." She said, patting my back. "You're one of the best people I've met."
"Then why are you leaving me?" I asked, pleading for an answer. "Don't you love me?"
"I don't know.. William. And as for leaving, it's my destiny." She said. "It's my fate, and I had to choose it."
She chose it.
And her future, her destiny.. is one without me?
But I want one with her.
"I want my future with you, Violet." I said. "..Why do you have to leave?"
"I'm sorry." Was all she said. "I'm so sorry."
"You're not sorry for going into my life, and I'm glad you're not." I said. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, Violet. You've taught me to be a better person, to actually care and let life take me places. To think, to be soft.." I choked. "And to love someone with all my heart."
She smiled at me sadly, as if a bullet hit her chest. She didn't shed a tear, but sat there blankly and saddened.
"Violet, when you ran me over with that bike, you were on my mind." I said.
She was my first love.
"William.." Was all she could say.
"You're the greatest teacher of life, and you're.. just the best. Violet, I love you. I really, really do." And those were the last words I said. The silence was long again. We just sat there like strangers, and she just kept her gaze fixed on the ground.
I'm nothing. But she's everything. I love Violet. She's my everything. She's what keeps me happy.
Now she's being taken away, for god knows how long. Forever? There will never be another Violet, and there will never be a girl that makes me happy, and there will never be a girl like her that I can love. I can certainly like someone, but the feeling of loving someone for the first time is the best feeling of my life. She was the one, and now she's leaving me perhaps for good.
"Flights to Rome Italy, departing in 15 minutes. Please line up at the boarding gates if you haven't presented your boarding passes already." The intercom said. "Flight 151, Rome, Italy. Please proceed to the boarding gates."
"That's us." Allan said, coming back. He had a bag of Duty free in his hand.
"Let's go, honey." Allan said.
"Oh my god.. bye Violet! Bye you guys.." Elizabeth sobbed.
"Bye, Violet." Diego said. "It was nice being your friend."
"Bye, everyone." Violet said softly. "Bye, William." She looked over to me.
"Bye, Violet." I said those words, and my heart broke immediately. I whispered under my breath, "I love you.."
I love her.
She turned away, walking arm and arm with her boyfriend, laughing and smiling as if we never had sorrow for her leaving.
Please, just let her look at me for the last time..
That one look will let me know how she really does feel..
I clenched my fists slightly, feeling the sting of tears well up in my eyes. The feeling unfamiliar to me, the feeling that I felt when I was merely a child, and before you know it.. I felt hot tears run down my cheeks.
I was crying for the first time in years.
And it was because I loved her.
She was the girl who made me soft, who made me care, who made me love. She was the girl who taught me the most vital lessons in life, she was the girl who succeeded in coloring the gray in my world, my heart, and she was the girl who I can never forget. She was Violet Caberah.
For a moment, it seemed like a miracle. Slowly, she turned her head to me as she was walking to her terminal. Her beautiful violet eyes looking into mine, the beautiful ones of the girl I loved.
And from that moment, I knew what she felt about me.
I'll see you, whenever.
note: Any questions in regards to this story or whatnot will be
answered in profile or email. : Thanks very much! Hope you liked my
story.. Even if it ends like this. ;