Just Existing

The beating in my chest

Is ticking slower

It's waning now

I hear their screams

Around me and I know

They're wondering how

How could they not have known

They didn't think

It would come to this

And in the shadow

Of an ending life

Ignorance really was their bliss

I hear the whirling

Sirens moan

Echoing their plight

And hearing tones

In their screech

All know someone's in their fight

When the moaning

Ends the

Bodies move

And then the needles

Come alive

Etching their painful grove

Then everything goes

Black as night

Except a glaring path

And as I walk toward

The gorgeous light

I hope this breath's my last

But just as I reach

The golden glow

I am jerked alive

Everyone's staring down at me

Thinking from

Insanity I derived

I glance down at my wrist

Once cut

Now wrapped in painful white

Blood stains taint

The Ivory glow

Nothing's ever right

All I wanted

Was my death

But they had to bring me back

And now I have

To live shadowed by

The life of which I lack

I don't need their piety

Or the looks

They're bound to give

I just want to break

These chains around me.

To go forth and really live

To live, to die

I couldn't

Really care

But I'm tired of

Just existing

Under the sunlight's judging glare

I glance up to

My family

And know they too judge me

And I hope someday

Not so far

They can look past this and see