comfortable: 7/8/06
it's not quite dark out yet— it's a
little past seven but it's summer now
so it'll be light for awhile longer— &
i'm walking through town in my favorite
new dress & my shoes that clack-clack-clack
when i move & it's one of those days
when i just feel beautiful & comfortable
in this imperfect skin & i feel happy. honestly,
purely happy. & for once it's not because of
you, or anything you've ever said. it's all me.

i'm walking past the movie theater where
we went on our first date & think about a
lot of things that haven't come up in my mind
in awhile. i know you'd remember if i asked
you— about how nervous i was but how
perfect you made me feel; how it felt to be so
wrapped up in you, & how we watched
maybe ten minutes of the movie because you
were holding my hand so tight & it all just made
sense for an hour or two. & then we left &
walked in the dark with your arms around me &
i couldn't stop smiling for all the world because it
was just so beautiful, that whole night— it all just
fit for a moment, & that was beautiful, just like us.

& then we were waiting for my dad to pick me up
in front of the picture-developing store that i've never
been into. & i bet you that you couldn't pick me up
& you ran me down the sidewalk in your arms & i
screamed so loud but i felt so safe, so right with you
that when my feet touched the ground i didn't know
what to do. & i went home that night & couldn't sleep
for hours because i couldn't stop smiling, feeling the
weight of your arms around me & my head on your
chest & i knew it was something real.

& all that somehow faded into tatters of paper on the
sidewalk that get torn by the heels of my shoes as i walk
tonight, but i pass the one-hour photo sign that we sat by
that night & smile, & i know things are going to be okay.