She has no idea how bad I want her. She probably has no clue how often I glance her direction when our group gets together at Perkins. She doesn't notice how I inhale her scent when I hug her, savoring the flowery scent as if it's the last time I'll ever see her.
She doesn't understand my veiled compliments to her. I can see her puzzling it in her mind, but she'll never know.
She'll never know I want her. It all started the first time I met her. Ok, so I suppose I hit on her. I expected her to laugh it off or get embarrassed. I wasn't expecting what she did.
She snapped at me. Told me it wasn't my business to know her name and she didn't care if I thought she was pretty. Call me crazy, but she had me hooked. I had to have her.
I didn't see her for a while after that. But as I got closer to some of her other friends, I'd start asking about her. Why wasn't she here? What was she up to? They probably saw right through my nonchalance, but as long as she didn't, I was fine.
She thinks I'm weird. I know she does. She's told me so. But apparently she likes weird.
Does she like me?
No, what am I thinking? I'm a nerd, and one she doesn't understand at that. I look like a hippy. Does she wish I'd cut my long hair or does she like it?
I glance over at her and how the moonlight illuminates her pale skin. The black hair shadows her dark eyes from me, yet I sense her…looking at me?
Can this be? My heartbeat quickens and I inhale quickly. The butterflies in my stomach feel angry, flying in a rage.
She still has no idea how much I long to kiss her. I want to hold her, and tell her that I like her. I want to ask her out and have her say yes.
But she won't. So…I don't.
I turn away, trying to keep from feeling rejected. It hurts to want something so beautiful and wonderful that I can't have.
I feel her. At my side. She's looking up at me, a soft smile on her lips.
She says my name. I say hers back. "Michaela."