she's gone

Author's note} eh. i suppose these are after thoughts to the other poem. "..."=subconcious talking

She Doesn't Love You

"You don't need her."
yes i do... she's my best friend...
(shoulders tremble as sobs rock the body)

"She'll never look at you the same."
at least i don't have to lie now...
(tears soak the pillow)

"She'll never trust you."
she has every right not to....
(shaky breathing)

"You're pathetic. A little crybaby."
yes i am.... if you only understood...
(a hand massges the temple)

"Why do you cry about her? You can always find another."
because i betrayed her trust.... and i hurt her...
(shivers run through the body's frame)

"She doesn't love you. Forget her."
she loves me... just not the same way i love her... she still cares though...
(eyes sqeeze tightly shut)

"Someone'll find out. Your life will be around school again."
doesn't matter. they all know everything anyway.... he wasn't good at keeping secrets....
(another shaky breath)

"Just forget her. She won't ever love you the way you want her to."
but i can love her... and make sure she's safe and happy....
(drifts to sleep, still fighting with herself)