My Fair Joel

My Fair Joel

Warnings: Twisted, sick, sadistic, and even slashy (that's homosexuality for those of you who are behind the times ^_^) Just consider about every warning ever invented. Jesus, reading this over, I wonder what the hell provoked this ?! Let's just say it's a side of Wrenn we never wanted to see.

Special note for clarity: This is written in first person, but different people speak, and to make it clearer for you when you're reading, when the person who's telling the story speaks out loud, it won't have quotation marks. If you *really* can't figger it out I may revise it, but I tried to put in as much as possible to let you know when the actual speaking out loud is going on.

Wrenny's life is falling down,

Falling down,

Falling down,

Wrenny's life is going to hell,

My fair Joel.

Wrenn is muttering something to himself in a singsong voice and I can't hear what it is. I wish I knew.

Oh what a clever song I've made Joel. Don't you want to hear, baby? Of course you do, you always listen to me. I'm your love; you say so all the time.

You're looking at me Joel. Strange, like you wish you knew what I'm thinking. Don't think that. These thoughts running through my brain are too wrong for you. Ooh, Babe, don't look me in the eyes. It makes me want to tell you what is on my mind.

"Wrenn? Honeypie?"

My name's not honeypie, but that's okay. I like it when you call me that. It sends shivers of pain up my back.

"Are you okay?"

You ask me like you already know I'm not going to answer, like you'll settle for that nearly imperceptible nod of my head.

Oh Joel, baby, I'm not okay. No, no, no. I laugh quite evilly and shake my head, loving the pain the movements bring shocking through my forehead.*

"What? Wrenn..."

You're staring at me and I'm sitting here folded on myself and you're all tall and shining, and oh, Joel, baby, I'm not.

"Wrenn, do you need to talk?"

I laugh again and look up at you with one eye that hurts to move and laugh again and shake my head. Pain, pain, all good pain. **

The pain used to make me unhappy. But it only used to. Now it's like pleasure, pain in pleasure, pleasure in pain. I crave the pain as much as the pleasure now. Oh, baby, baby, baby. Make me hurt, Joel, baby.

"Wrenn, talk. To me. Now."

You're trying to command me but it isn't going to work. All I want right now is for you to hurt, to feel the delicious pain, to scream my name, scream for me to stop.

Ohh, that's got me reacting, the very idea of you tied up and bleeding and me lapping at your blood and cutting you some more, and you so helpless...


You walk over and shake me like that's going to cure anything. Instead it sends spears of pain rattling through my skull and makes me laugh. It sears through me and I'm laughing while I'm shuddering. Uncontrollably, now, shuddering even though you've let go of me.

You're looking at me now in horror, your blue eyes filled with tears and pain. Oh no, I'm making you sad; I don't want that to happen. Yeah, baby? I'll have to make it better.

I lurch to my feet in a jerky, shivering movement, and read in your eyes the confusion at the fact that I'm no longer graceful.~

Oh honey, I never was graceful inside and now it's come to my outsides. Sorry.


Your voice echoes through the house, deep and smooth as cream. I love your voice. I wonder now what it'll sound like screaming in pain. Oooh, baby, it makes me shiver in anticipation, that thought.

"Wrenn, dammit, you better tell me what's wrong or I'll---"

You can't even finish the damn threat, Joel, you sure as hell can't hurt me, baby. Not like I'm going to hurt you later.

You back away from me and I realize I croaked that out loud. Oh well, better that you know now. I like it when they run from me. It makes the thrill of the kill stronger. Better. I get off on hurting people.

Oh, baby, this is gonna be fun, fun, fun. You'll see. At first, it'll hurt, but when I'm done there won't be anyone who can hurt you anymore.

You're pressed up against the wall now and breathing hard, and I realize I've moved closer to you and my bleeding hands are near your throat. I want to caress your soft skin and leave tracks of crimson, beautiful designs, all over it. Uh huh, baby?

You still want me even though you're afraid, huh? Yeah. Uh huh. I move closer to you and your lips part, soft, loving, rose petals. Oh, they'll be bloody and ravaged when I'm done. I think red is more beautiful than pink anyway. But then you're beautiful any way I can have you. Dead or alive. I'm going to kill you, Joel. And probably myself too. But not too quickly. I want to elicit every drop of that delicious pain before we die.

I track a bloody finger down the hollow of your milky throat in an elaborate pattern and laugh.

"Wrenn, what are you doing?"

I don't reply; simply rub my leg against the inside of your thigh, feeling you hard already. Ooh, Joel, love; you're still affected by me even if you are scared shitless.


I murmur innocently, tracking crimson designs along your neck and collarbones and then lifting the hem of your shirt to trace my bloody fingers along your smoothly muscled stomach and around the dip in the center of your stomach. Licking my lips as the crimson stains your pale flesh. Delicious.

I dip my tongue into your navel gently and you moan, trying to push me away from you and failing. Miserably.

I lift your shirt more and continue tracing along your chest, smooth muscles jumping under my touch. You finally push away from me and run.

I follow and find you grappling for a gun in your dresser. You really think you can kill me? Yeah, right, Joel.

I smile innocently, watching my crimson designs trailing on their own, of their own will.

You think I'm smiling at you and drop the gun with a strangled cry.

Oh superb, Joel babe. You're already hurting from the inside. That's the worst kind of hurt, I know, baby. Mmm, I love you.

I said that last sentence out loud and you're crying now.

Oh, now, don't cry. I won't make you hurt too much.

I smile to place emphasis on my words. Not too much, just enough. I won't push you over the edge. Just enough to make you feel this.


Feel this, Joel.

I walk forward to you and bite viciously on your lip, tasting the blood pooling in my mouth. You're crying and squirming and making mewling noises deep in your throat and boy is it turning me on.

Hurt me!

I squeal anticipatorily into your ear, and you push me to the ground, eyes blaring in a pale face. Your blood trails down your chin and pools in the hollow of your neck.

"What's wrong with you?!"

Hmm. I think, humming that clever tune to myself, and watch you standing over me, me still prone on the ground.

What do you think is wrong with me?

Really, I'm not quite sure.

I think I may have been pushed over the edge.

Yes, that's it, and now I'm falling...falling, falling.

I murmur falling to myself over and over, my mind swirling in combined crimson and black.

"Wrenn. Wake up."

Oh, so you think this is a nightmare? Hm. We'll see about that.

I whip myself up and slam my fist into your nose, feeling it crunch deliciously beneath my hand and feeling blood pour into my open hand, lapping gently at it and around your nose.

You scream.

That doesn't feel like a nightmare. Does it?

"N-n-no-no--nonononooonooo, Wrenn, n--"

I cut you off by dealing you a fierce blow to the side of your head. Your eyes go crooked and I laugh again. #

Hit you hard, did I?


Your terrified words are music to my ears, I slam myself into you and kiss you roughly, you scream and writhe and try to throw me off and I'm just merrily ecstatic here.

You throw me to the ground finally and run again, but you stumble, the blow I dealt you to the head muddling your thoughts and vision.

OOOh this is good already.


Uh uh, Joel, baby. No way. This is too good. You think it's good too, I can tell. In your eyes.


Uh huh,

I nod and leave myself open to anything you want to do to me. Ooh please hurt me, I want to hurt, make me hurt like you do honey.


I call plaintively.

"SHUT UP you little FUCKING bastard!" You move back into the room and kick me sharply in the side. Oh god! I feel a few ribs crack there. It sends me into that terrifying ecstasy, hurting so much.


I moan, wriggling and feeling my ribs protest deliciously with every movement.

Oh, you've got it now. You're coming toward me with that sadistic smile on your face, the one you only use when you're slicing someone's internal organs to bits and enjoying it.$$

Mmm, your killing smile.

You heard that, I didn't mean for you to.


Oh yeah. Ohhh yeah.

"Damn. Now I'm gonna have to kill you." ^^

Just try.

You pull my arm and lead me to think you're going to help me up and then---

Twist. Crack.

Ooh, good. Good, good, good. Mmmhmm, my arm is in terrifying amounts of pain, but I lash my foot out and catch you in the kneecap.

It shatters and you cry out and fall.

Too bad, you cried, you've lost. I win. I'm going to have to kill you instead of just doing what I was going to do. Once more, I'm the hunter, you're the prey. I shrug, my arm sending spikes of pain up to drive into my brain.

You lose.

I whisper it and stand up weakly, pain, pain, pain shuddering all up my length and making me happy, no one can hurt me anymore, pain is pleasure. I glance once at you and lash my foot out to catch you a glancing blow to your head, you cry out again.

Pain, pain, all pain, nothing but pain.


You're moaning now and there's a trickle of blood running down the side of your head. I place my foot on your chest and stomp once, cracking several ribs and probably puncturing your lungs.


Ah, my Joel, a lovely scream. Better than when I scream for sure. Your voice cracks and you begin screaming in hysterical fear. Coughing up crimson splots and crying, whimpering, screaming.

I kick you towards the bed, laughing, each breath hurting. Try to drag you onto it, you cursing and screaming hysterically, writhing weakly.

Oh, you won't escape. You might as well give it up now, Joel.

You close your eyes and scream again, piercingly.

Shut up already.

I cuff you roughly and grab your long ponytail, yank it viciously. You whimper and shut up.

"Wrenn...don', Wrenn..."

You mumble weakly over and over, no no, Wrenn, and I smile sadistically and look down into your fogged cobalt eyes.

I raise a hand and glance at it. It's still bleeding. Good. @

I rip at your shirt and begin running my nails down your bare skin, drawing red designs on your pale skin, gouging your flesh.

And I'm laughing again, maniacally now. It's fun. Torturing Joel is fun.

Strips of flesh are peeling off now when I scratch you, and you're still screaming hysterically. Fun, fun, fun.

Somewhere in the house a door opens. I don't care. This is too much fun.

I thought I heard Joel screaming.

That in itself is plenty strange. Joel's a very quiet young man, hardly the type to be screaming hysterically and sobbing uncontrollably.

Come to think of it, Dear Gods, what would it take to make him scream like that?

I open the door to the apartment and look around. The screaming's less muffled now and more hysterical. Joel's voice, that's for sure.

I look around, flipping my red-streaked hair§ out of my eyes and glancing suspiciously. Joel's room. And it certainly isn't just Wrenn and Joel having some bedtime fun. He's sounding urgent.

"Ooh, fun," Wrenn's soft voice, with an underlying tone of saffron malice. ¨

Funny how voices appear as colors to me, and now Wrenn's light purple is streaked with crimson and saffron. Dear Gods.

Joel's voice is completely lime with panic and terror. His normal cobalt isn't showing at all. Dammit!

I throw off my overcoat and run into Joel's room, drawing my gun as I do so.ª


Wrenn glances up at me, his normally sparkling lavender eyes flat and expressionless, almost grey. His hair is streaked with blood and he's got this look on his face. A look that shouldn't be there.

Just as I thought. He's snapped.

Same as my Lucien, only when I met Lucien he'd already snapped and it was my job to nurse the poor boy back to sanity.©

Wrenn! Stop it!

"Why? He screams when I do it." Wrenn turns those lavender eyes to me with an innocent, childlike expression.W

He doesn't like the pain like you do. Stop, Wrenn. I don't want to kill you.

"I want you to."

No, Wrenn, you don't, just think about it.

I'm trying to weave some sort of web around him with my silver-and-ruby voice and it's not working. He's farther gone than I thought.

Joel has stopped screaming and is just sobbing now, his chest is bare and there are weeping scratch marks along it, his face is bruised, and his nose is nearly unrecognizable.

Joel? Can you hear me?

"Rubyn?" he croaks, voice strained and painful, some of his cobalt showing through at last.

It's me.

I try to think of something else to say but Wrenn leaps off Joel and pounces on me. Even in his adrenaline-crazed state, though, he's no match for me; he's a foot shorter.y

I wrestle him to the floor, cursing when he scratches me, or bites me, or whatever. Finally, I'm on top of him and have him pinned, and before he can reverse the position, I grab my gun and knock his temple with the butt of it, rendering him effectively unconscious.

"Rubyn," Joel pants, sitting up and gazing at me with hurt eyes. "Ru--"

I walk quickly to him and throw my arms around him; not minding that the silk shirt I have will surely be ruined by his blood.

It'll be okay, he won't remember in the morning. Or whenever he wakes up.

"But I will." Joel's sobbing into my shoulder.

I wonder where you are at the moment; you should get here soon enough. You can deal with Wrenn, I can work with Joel. Come on, Lucien, come on.

I know, I know. You'll never forget. But that, just then,

I gesture to Wrenn, unconscious with a look of sweet innocence that seems out of place on his bloody features.

That wasn't really Wrenn. That was a monster in his subconscious taking him over, Joel. Sweetheart, don't be afraid of Wrenn.

Ah, the door opens. Your voice calls my name, you're finally here.

In here.

You walk in and those quick green eyes summarize it in an instant. I remember how your eyes used to be flat like Wrenn's were.

"Rubyn." Your gold voice catches my attention.

Hm, Luce?

"I can take care of Wrenn. You and Joel go back home, I'll stay here and wait for him to wake up, and we'll talk it out."

I flash you a quick smile.

You're a Lifesaver, Lucien. Cherry.

You grin back and brush your blonde bangs back out of your narrow, sweet face. "I like lime better."

Lime, then. Green. Like those eyes.

Joel is listening to us banter and he's stopped crying now, he's just staring at you with frightened blue eyes.

Come on, Joel, let's go to my house, and we'll talk. I think I can help.

Joel nods and I stand up, letting him use my tall frame as a crutch. Damn. His kneecap is shattered and a gentle touch to his chest tells me that some of his ribs are, too.

:: You be okay, Ru?:: z Your thought broadcasts to me, in your usual gold with a hint of pale blue concern.

:: Yeah, I'll put him in a healing trance or something. He'll be well enough by the time you're home. What worries me is if he'll ever trust Wrenn again.::

::I think he will. Those two have quite the bond.::

:: Uh huh.::

I'm walking out the door to the room, slowly, grabbing my overcoat and tossing it over Joel's shoulders.

Your concerned face peeks out at me, your dusty rose complexion clouded.

:: Love you, Ru. Take care of yourself and Joel. I can do the rest with Wrenn. He'll be a little easier than Joel I think.:: this time your voice holds that elusive shining burgundy of love.

:: Love you too, Luce. Hope you get him feeling better. Call if you need help.::

:: You call too, on the hour, if I'm not home by midnight, then just call me whenever you want. Or:: your voice takes on sunny humor, :: you always could go to sleep.::

:: Be no fun without you.:: I wink mentally. :: Call me and we can try phone sex.::

You giggle out loud and Joel looks at you curiously.

::I was just kidding,:: I quip back, winking quickly, this time with my real eye.

::Hey, hey, I might take you up on that.:: Your sunny words echo in my mind as I walk out the door.

"Take care, Rubyn!"

I nod and say to Joel,

Come on, huh? Let's go home.

I sit quietly, waiting for Wrenn to wake up.

Geeze, you must've given him a hard one.

I can barely remember a time when I was like he was. Barely, but it niggles in the back of my mind. Annoyingly.

Lucien, Lucien, I shake my head to myself, pulling the ribbon out of my hairà and retying it at the nape of my neck. He might still be feeling hair-grabby when he wakes and I want to keep the hair I have.

I track your progress with my mind, watching your car as you navigate through traffic towards the circus tent and the trailer we live in.

God, I'm so lucky you pulled me off the street, Rubyn, so lucky. I'm so lucky you took the time to salvage my bleeding mind and make me sane again.

Wrenn stirs and mumbles something, but he's still unconscious.

I reach out to you with a tentative mental hand and feel it grasped in a warm, firm other hand.

We can't talk over this distance but can still feel each other. I know you're watching me too. Protectively.

I'm ready to talk to him, I will be gentle, I won't make him hurt. He may remember a little as it is, but I have to make him see it all...I'll try not to hurt him...

You can help Joel. You're the healer, not I. I'm the destroyer of life, made to destroy, and you're made to give.

That's okay; I've long since learned to accept who I am.

I sigh.

What have we learned today, Lucien?

There's an old German proverb that says, "Love can turn a cottage into a golden palace."

Well, I know firsthand that love can also turn a normally sweet, adorable, and caring boy into a screaming psychopath with a lust for pain and blood...

Trouble is, how am I going to convince him it was love?À


*--Well, Wrenn has a horrible migraine, and it shows. You know, one of those headaches where it hurts to simply move your head?

**--When I have migraines, it really hurts to look upward. Mostly hurts to look anywhere, but more specifically it REALLY hurts to look upward.

~--Ever noticed that when people are unhappy or in pain they tend to lose the grace in their movements? ^_~

#--Again, people's eyes stay crooked for a while when they get hit really hard on the head. If you've never gotten hit hard enough to be cross-eyed for the rest of the day, feel lucky. Owch.

$$--You guys all don't know this yet but Joel is a homicidal and suicidal maniac. His best friend died and his family spurned him when they found out he was homosexual, and well, he got really mad. He's know as the Sabre 'round town, mostly kills people who are known adulterers or homophobics, gay bashers, etc, etc.

^^--Joel kills anyone who sees his face as the Sabre and obviously Wrenn has, and although Wrenn is Joel's lover, Joel doesn't particularly care right now, his nose is broken and he's really pissed. Joel: Dammit, I love my nose! You hear me!

@-- Again, you folks don't know that Wrenn paper cut his fingers deeply and deliberately. He has a lot of paper to do that with, and if you cut 'em deeply enough, they bleed for a long time.

§--This is so cool! It's Rubyn DiMande (Ruby Diamond, get it??) who you don't know yet. He has hair that's silver streaked with red and gorgeous silver eyes. He's a trapeze artist. Like I said, you don't know much about him at all yet ^_^ but I love him. He's also the boy who's naughty with Joel and Wrenn when they want an extra person in their bed... ^_~ or some of you may also say o_O

¨--Rubyn is also a synthete, or however you spell that. He has a rare condition called synthesia that allows him to associate colors with voices, tastes with certain sounds, etc, etc. His voice-color-emotion connection is strongest, though...Smithsonian had a great article on synthesia you might want to read in the something me if you really want the issue date.

ª--Carries his gun everywhere. Bad Ru, bad. ^_~

©--Let's clarify. When Rubyn found Luce, he was a huddled mass who bit, kicked, or scratched anything that came within appendage's-length and had a tendency to go into mad giggle-fits. Rube found out he was also telepathic and they developed a strong mental bond, to the point where the instable Lucien refused to go anywhere without Rubyn. He literally attached himself to Rubyn like a leech and refused to let go. Needless to say, the circus crew was not overly pleased until one day they found Luce throwing knives at a terrified horse-rider lady and missing--by fractions of an inch. He was a new addition to the circus but obviously wasn't allowed to perform, being insane and tendent to have mad giggle-fits and froth at the mouth when Ru was out of his sight. Ru got a lot of abuse from Lucien but also loved him, and finally sat Lucien down and forced him with willpower to talk everything that was causing his imprisonment in a world of pain and hell, in the mental state of a three-year-old, and by the next day, Luce was transformed to a normal if slightly forlorn and personality-less 17-year-old. Lucien regained his personality, has stayed mentally stable ever since, and is very happy now. The flat state of Wrenn's eyes reflects some sort of imprisonment in his mind--Luce did exactly the same thing, those green eyes weren't always as alert as they are now. But Luce had the nice tendency to occasionally come out of his haze and was incredibly perceptive and intelligent when he did so. And this is my little blurb on Lucien. The real story shall be later. It's in progress. (Oh yeah, he also joins Joel, Wrenn, and Ru when they want another person in their bed ^_~)

W--Ooh O_O Creepy, ne?

y--Ack! Wrenn's height has changed, he's only 5'5", which makes RuRu dear (Rubyn: DON'T CALL ME THAT!) 6'5" O_O HE'S TALL! *Big hearts grow in eyes*

z--Telepaths, like I said. The :: proceeding and following a statement means they're sending thoughts ^_^

Ã--Yippee! You can see a picture of how Luce usually wears his hair when I get it done, I'll insert the's basically a ponytail with a ribbon near the veeeeeeeeeeeery bottom.

À--The last paragraphs, the part from "What have we learned today, Lucien?" to the symbol, were thought up by my brilliant cohort, fawkesy_and_lovin_it AKA Katie. THANK YOU GIRL! Isn't that the peeeeeeeeeeeeeerfect ending? I sure as hell think so!


That's all, folks, how'd you like it? ^_^

Crowd of readers: X_X

Oh gawrsh, I think I killed 'em.

BTW, the speakers since I do a lot of jumping around

--- separates the speakers

1) Wrenn

2) Joel

3) Wrenn

4) Rubyn

5) Lucien

Review, or I may send insane Wrenn and Luce to getcha!

Readers: O_O

Haha, that woke 'em up!

Wrenn: Why am I so mean in this story?

Joel: Yeah, he broke my nose and all!

Lucien: Teenagers *shaking head* Why must they go and try to kill their boyfriends violently and sadistically?

Rubyn: *sweatdrop* Uhm, Luce, that's not exactly normal teenage behavior...

Lucien: ..............

Wrenn: *sniff* I'm not *sniff* normal???

Andi (me): well we all knew that already! ;-P

I'm taking suggestions for background music...I've got some already, Luce's theme is "Shackled" by Vertical Horizon, it always plays when he's around =D and at the beginning you gotta have the little music-box version of "London Bridge Is Falling Down" (DUUH!) and Fuel's songs "Prove" "Scar" and "Easy" work well, as well as Filter's "Cancer" (YEAH BABY FUEL AND FILTER YEAH YEAH YEAH!)

Wrenn: besides, I'm 20, I'm not a teenager.

Lucien: You're younger than me and that automatically makes you either a teenager or a kid.

Wrenn: *grumble*

Okay, as I said, that's all...I'm hoping to build a fandom here...Don't you love my characters??? What? I can't heaaaaaaaaar you!!!

Readers: *mumble* ^_^;;

Oh yeah, more BG music... "Push" by Matchbox 20, maybe even "Beautiful" by Creed...whatcha think??


Now after bugging you incessantly, I'll go. ^_^

Love, Andi banandi.

(The Fuel Goddess)

(The Goddess of Insane Homicidal Psychopaths)