Hold Me In Your Heart: Chapter One – My Little White Lies Tell A Story

Author's Note – This is Slash. M/M. If you do not like that fact, click the little 'x' and all will be well. Don't bother to flame me, I will ignore you and push it aside as ignorance. Reviews are loved to horribly much though. Also, the chapter titles will most likely not have anything to do with the chapter. Just little quotes I thought were cool. Anyway, enjoy!


My eyes clouded over in complete and utter confusion. Since when had my friend been so gorgeous? It wasn't the fact that I was now staring at my shirtless best friend. It was the fact that my shirtless best friend was, in fact, a male, as am I. He glanced over and caught me staring, and I turned away blushing a deep shade of scarlet.

"What's wrong? Your face is getting all red." Did I mention he's a complete idiot? At the moment, though, I was completely grateful for this fact. When I didn't answer he shrugged slightly and turned back to rummaging through his drawer. He pulled on a plain white T-shirt and I found that I was slightly saddened by the fact that I could see his bare chest or-

'What the fuck?' I scold myself. My friend, Gayle, is just about the happiest guy in the world. He's always going crazy over this or that and obsessing over something new. At school he's always the center of attention, it's quite cute actually. I still find it weird how we are so incredibly close. Unlike him, I am quiet and I usually find myself insulting him. I can't help it, really. He's just so insult able. That's why in school I'm known as, 'The ass that sits in the back of class' or 'Lucky emo kid who hangs with Gayle'. It sucks, really. He's so perfect and I'm so… not.

"Hayden!" I snap out of my thoughts at his voice and roll my eyes. He's jumping around frantically, flailing his arms this way and that. "Hayden, help me! This bee is attacking me!" He hates bees; he's absolutely terrified of them and every other bug. "Hayden, please!" Fighting back my laughter, I stand up and grab his arm, pulling him down on the bed.

"I don't see a bee," I mutter coolly and turn around to see him bouncing up and down on the bed, giggling insanely. His constant happiness can be frightening sometimes, really. He's always been like that though. I met him in kindergarten while we were doing art. He leaned over and told me how wonderful my blue blob looked. We've just been friends every since. My mother and his mother met when we had our first little 'sleepover' and they are almost as inseparable as the two of us.

"I was just kidding!" Gayle chirped, pulling me down beside him on the bed. He begins to sing something that sounds strangely like one of Vanessa Carlton's songs. I'm staring at him again, drinking in his perfect looks. He has thick brown hair, falling to his jaw line and amazingly gorgeous sapphire blue eyes. He's about six foot, and very muscular. I don't know why though… all he does is bounce a round and eat sugar and junk food.

I, myself, am Hayden, as you know. I am nowhere near as gorgeous as the boy beside me on the bed. Our hair is the only thing similar, but his is shorter and lighter than mine. Mine is black and falls just past my jaw line. I've got boring emerald green eyes and I am short. About five foot, four. I'm skinny too, but I am not completely lacking muscles.

"What'cha thinking about?" Gayle's voice came from beside me and I looked over to be greeted by his smiling face. I almost melted. I'm not gay I'm not. He's just to perfect not to notice. A small frown plays on my lips and his smile slips away immediately. "What's wrong?" He does that too, he goes from completely crazy to scarily serious.

"I'm fine," I lie with a slight shrug of my shoulders. I'm scared. I'm horribly scared at the feeling I have been getting lately when I'm around him. I'm straight though, completely and totally straight. Not even bi. Just straight. He moves closer and slips his arm around me. I swear to God, my heart just stopped. "Don't." I whisper, my usually cold tone completely changing. I move away from him and he looks hurt.

"What's wrong with you lately?" Gayle growls clearly annoyed that I am being an ass. I don't understand why, though. I'm always an ass, especially to him. Come one! He's my best friend. I'm allowed to be an ass to him. That doesn't stop me from being an ass to everyone else too, though. His treatment is special though.

"I'm not fucking gay!" I bite out, not able to stop myself. I have no idea what possessed me to say. Oh, yes I do. That stupid little voice in my head that's screaming 'You're gay, you're gay!' He gives me a confused look, and raises his eyebrow. There's that damn voice again, 'you want him. He's just too pretty to resist. Don't deny it, just tell him.' I bite my bottom lip and look away nervously. I don't want him. Gayle is my best friend with a girlfriend and I am completely and totally straight. God, I hope I am…

"So… you're upset that you're not gay?" Gayle ponders, giving me another look of confusion. I fight the urge to roll my eyes and do not answer him. Now I bet he thinks that is it. Wonderful, I'm so smart. "Or are you trying to hide the fact that you are gay? If so, I am perfectly alright with it if you are, I really am!" He's always so accepting and doesn't judge anyone. He's amazing.

"I'm not gay, Gayle." I mutter, voice not as cold or angry. Then I wonder what would happen if everyone at school found out I was gay – which I'm not, I'm just wondering! At the moment I am glad that school is already out for the summer. I don't think I could take all the pressure of getting good grades and such in my current situation. Which is noticing how much better boys looks than girls. I'm not gay.

Gayle gives me that brilliant heart-stopping smile and I melt all over again. So I'm gay and I am falling for my best friend. Fucking brilliant, right?


Author's Notes – It's short and I used the f-word a lot, I know. It was the best I could do at the moment, okay? Gya. I will continue updating this though, because Gayle is my baby and I love him dearly.

A review would totally make my day, by the way.