"So why do you try to remember?"
"Because it is important to remember."
"It is important to remember."
"So I don't forget."
"What is wrong with forgetting?"
"I'll be losing something."
"You remember out of fear of loss?"
"Losing what makes you human?"
"What makes you human?"
"My memories make me human."
"Is a newborn child human?"
"Then memories do not make us human, we can also rule out emotions, logical thought, and our interactions with other people. So what makes us human? What is the only thing that a newborn has?"
"The fact that we are alive makes us human. How are we different from animals, if life is all that makes us human?"
"The will to have that life?"
"Won't a dog bite back if you try to harm it?"
"So does that dog have a will?"
"No. It's just following its instinct."
"Is instinct any different than will?"
"Yes, will is the power and desire for the betterment of oneself. It is the power and want to make change."
"So to change is to be human?"
"Change means that there is something lost. If you fear loss, don't you fear being human?"
"In a way... We are all afraid of ourselves."
"Why is that?"
"Because when we are ourselves, we are not someone else, we are alone."
"Is loneliness to be feared?"
"Why? Because loneliness makes an aching in our hearts. No one wants to feel alone, we all want to feel needed, we all want to belong."
"And this is what loneliness is? To be cut off?"
"Yes, loneliness is to not be complete."
"I see. Then is being together, being complete?"
"No. We are destined to be alone. We live our lives only as ourselves, no matter how many people we are surrounded by, the soul is still an island. In death we are alone, just as we cannot take the physical world with us, we cannot take another being with us."
"If you cannot take anything with you when you die, what do you become, nothing?"
"I will still have myself."
"But without anything else, you will cease to have meaning. Changing is being human, without anything to change or be changed, your humanity will cease."
"In all probability, yes."
"That is sad."
"To be human is to know sadness."
"If faced only with oblivion, why do you keep living?"
"Some of us create false hopes that there is something after death, some of us live for the moment, enjoying what they can, when they can."
"But why do you live?"
"Because if I chose not to, then there really wouldn't be anything at all. I do not choose to live for hope, love, or faith..."
"Why do you live?"
"Because I am myself, and there will be a day after this day, and a day after tomorrow, whether I am there or not."
"Is that a reason to live?"
"There is a theory that states that if the universe expands rapidly enough, it can escape its destiny and continue to exist forever."
"Is that a reason to live?"
"Yes, I live because I want to live. Because I have will. I live because I am human, and that is what humans do, they live."
"That is sad."
"Thank you, I understand more now than I did before... It makes me... want to be human."
"Are you sorry that you exist only as wires and as gears?"
"I... do not know..."
"That is the first step to becoming human, uncertainty. The next step is this-"
I hugged her, and as I felt her hair, her pseudo-skin, felt her warmed by tiny motors humming away... I wondered... Is she really any different than I am? I was made by human hands, and so was she. We have our differences, but perhaps...
"What does this mean? This thing you are showing me? Where the arms wrap around the shoulders and th-"
I kissed her. Her lips were soft, though there was no breath. She tried to finish her sentence, but some paradox placed within her by her makers kept her silent. A paradox placed within her by her creator... perhaps we weren't all so different after all. I stopped kissing her and looked into her eyes, beautiful blue things, like the sky and sea hashed into one.
"What does that mean? Is it emotion?"
"Yes, it is called love."
"I am sorry..."
"That I am not human like you... Or else... I would be able to understand why it is you do that. I am sorry that I cannot be what you want..."
"So am I... but just stay like you are until I forget that I'm human and you're not..." I was lost within her.
"Forgetting one's humanity... Losing one's will to live... This 'love' is a terrible thing."
"Did you say something?"
"No... I was merely computing some information..."
"Oh..." I was lost within her.