I've got a new wand;
It's pretty well spent.
It's bruised, and its broken, and nearly all bent.

My aunt sent it new;
She paid 40 silver.
But the postal delivery just didn't deliver!

My first wave, a centaur;
My second a horn.
My third mixed them into a centunicorn!

I could not believe it;
Ecstatic was I!
With this kind of magic an ostrich could fly!

My fourth was a leprechaun;
Fifth was a castle
Sixth mixed them into a large Irish hassle!

The castle was there;
Then it was not!
It granted three wishes and one golden pot!

I could not believe it;
Embarrassed was I.
My powerful wand had fast gone awry!

I tried to restore them;
I tried to make nice.
But each time attempted just did not suffice!

My troll was a patsy;
My elf was a freak.
My wand hasn't worked well for more than a week!

My faerie got tall;
My ogre grew short.
I should sue the wandmakers in Magical Court!

It fizzles and fights;
It pops and it glows
Bright orange and red and purple and rose.

But the dwarves will accuse;
And the dragons may roar,
"Why didn't you throw that poor wand out the door?"

Perhaps I now will!
That's just what I'll do!
I'll send that old wand back to Aunt Agnes, too.

She gave me that thing;
I thought it a blessin.
But no wands for me, thanks! I've learned my lesson!