Oh Pretty Cactus

Oh pretty cactus on my window sill,
You are so prickly and quite green also,

And you tell me who and what to kill,
Like that time i took a chainsaw to Gonzo

And maybe he is just a muppet,
But i found the guy's whole hand in there afterwards,

And it's your fault anyway for telling me to massacre puppets,
All of you cacti are total bastards,

Yet i guess you are kind of cool really,
I don't have to water you which is quite nice,

Because i'm pretty forgetful and very lazy,
And you retail for quite a reasonable price,

So i think i will keep you after all,
Mainly because you would put holes in my bin,

And then all my rubbish would fall out of the hole,
And i don't think i would like that very much.

©Saxon Drury Godden, 06.