Guilt

Why is it that every time I'm happy

Afterwards, I'm twice as sad?

Sometimes I'm filled with such joy

Only to have double the anguish.

Everything is going right

My life feels like it has meaning

A purpose for my being there

It makes me feel as if I should always be this way.

Yet,

When the day is over, I somehow feel worse.

I feel guilty for being selfish at the time

And I just realized how selfish.

So I lock myself in my little corner,

Away from the happiness that hurts.

In this corner, I am safe

And I shall stay in this corner

Forever remembering the happiness

And forever remaining guilty.

6/13/06

Kourtney McCloskey