Alan, Rob, and Alan all slept by the road and woke up with the itchy, red rashes from yesterday. Their throats were still sore and now their chests hurt.

"Dude… I really… need a drink."

They all talked hoarsely for a bit and decided to walk to another farm.

"Whew… All of our stuff is gone and now we have rashes and sore throats and aching chests… Now that I think about it those plants only had three leaves… Oh, shit. We smoked poison ivy."

"OH, SHIT! Dude, inhaled poison ivy smoke can kill you…"

"WAIT! Then why did we get high?"

"… Dude! I think that we thought that we were high… like a placebo."

"Dude what's a placebo?"

"It's… like when you think it's working its really not its your body fixing it by itself…"

"… Oh."

"Whatever… the point is that we could die."

They looked at each other and ran down the road waving at anyone who drove by. They were pumped full of adrenaline and even chubby Rob could run faster than Eric and Alan.

"AH! Look! A farm!"

They all ran to the front doorstep and a blind old woman hobbled forward. "Hello?"

Alan spoke the clearest and asked, "Ma'am, our car has wrecked down the road and we need to call 911 now because our friend is bleeding to death."

The old lady looked shocked and quickly said "Follow me sonny," she sniffed, "And your friend too." Eric went in while Rob stayed outside. She put her hands on their backs and ushered them forward.

"Now, the phone is over there."

The old lady walked into the kitchen. Alan whispered to Eric go talk to her loudly in the kitchen so she doesn't hear me."

Eric left and started distracting the old lady. Alan dialed 911 and told them that they had inhaled large amounts of poison ivy smoke.

The ambulance came blaring down the road and they were loaded up into the back.


Fifteen days after the incident they all made a full recovery. Their mothers were screaming demons for exactly one year and they never camped out again.

To this day the only people who knew why they had massive amounts of poison ivy smoke in their lungs was Rob, Alan, and Eric.

They all still live and have problems with their lungs and are expected to die in exactly 246 days, 3 hours, and 57 seconds.

They were friends for life.

A Note From The Author:

Hey, this chapter was supposed to be less humorous because of the seriousness of inhaling poison ivy smoke. It's fuckin' real and you can die. Oh, the characters Alan, Rob, and Eric are modeled off of Isaac, my friend who has moved, Robbie, one of my current friends, and Alan, me. Life for us is a little simpler in this story than in real life but we are very laid back dudes…

To SirScott: I hope this chapter was good.

To criti-sized: You actually got the poison ivy jab before I had them recognize it. The reason I didn't have the characters recognize the poison ivy is because this chapter needed that plot.

Now everyone remember: Don't smoke drugs or other plants you think is marijuana. And that this is a work of fiction. And that this story was a random thought, which was turned into a four-chapter story. See ya.