Her Celtic necklace fell posed on her pale neck. Tears stained tracks rolling down her cheeks falling mercilessly onto her computer table as "Hollywood Undead" song "My Black Dahlia" rang through her speakers echoing around her hollow room until the lyrics settled themselves inside her mind engraving themselves a permanent place in her memory. Her long fingers rapidly typed the remnants of an age old letter that had been building for something like 3 years now since she first set her eyes on that blade that since has taunted her thoughts and reaction to any situation since. Since that time when she had found that sticking your fingers down your throats could make you feel so in control of your own life. Now she stood at a record 3 stone lighter than when she started and now showed herself at 3 stone. Her ideal weight would have been 2 stone but her body had not yet resigned itself to her warped idea of what reality was meant to look like through her own eyes.
Her own thoughts ran back to the last conversation she had with her boyfriend…or now ex boyfriend. The idea of that sentence coming from her lips resolved in sending her body into another set of convulsed tears fallen from her already tired eyes. The blade lay there welcoming her warmth of hand her soft of touch. The letter was written and as she pressed the print button she threw open her bedroom window that led directly onto the A14 bridge. Where on average you had a 5 chance of surviving a fall. But she was not going to take that chance. As her soft hands grasped at the glinting blade she stood poised on her windowsill her feet positioned just right as to fall with no conscious thought needed. As she let the blade slit her worn skin vertically starting at the base of her hand all the way up to the base of her elbow. AS the scarlet blood started to form puddles on her skin. Tears welled up in her eyes as her mind thought of her family finding her letter, her friends reading what she wrote about each of them explaining to each of them individually why this was inevitable. She even left a letter for her ex, her thoughts played what she had written to him over and over again as she fell. She started to gain speed until the inevitable happened as her already dead body hit the hard concrete underneath her small body crushed to 1000 pieces inside.
She was oblivious to the screams of her family who had heard a thud fall from her room and to her younger sisters trembled sputters of words as she read the letter addressed to her. As she slowly handed the letters to her mother and father. And looked at the addressed envelopes.
She ran out of the house not caring about anything anymore and hit the post-box with full force but with so much adrenaline pumping through her veins she felt nothing and as her hand slammed the letters in the red box she collapsed in a heap on the paved floor in floods of tears. She read and re-read the letter from her only sister, as she read the last line the words; etched themselves into scaring her for life,"with love and kisses forever and always thought I wont always be there for you my spirit lives on within you so find me inside your heart I love you, Samantha"
The funeral was a very subdued affair with only a select few family and friends invited and with them Samantha's ex, Calvyn. He sat at the back of the dressed church. Black roses and lilies lay on her coffin and the church was dressed with white and black flowers of all kind. Tears fell all around the stained glass windows that pictured the most well known myths of the bible. Calvyn took the church in with regretful eyes. He knew she would have hated her funeral being held in a church underneath the undying eyes of god. She was as he an atheist and therefore had no set religion. But her family was catholic so he stood no chance in letting Samantha's funeral idea that she had written about in her letter to him. He found himself wishing he could turn back the time just for a few days to change the funeral. He would hate to see Samantha's beliefs die with her. He knew that he was the cause of this whole thing and that thought would haunt him for the rest of his life. He loved her. No one ever doubted that. They were to all onlookers the perfect couple but there was an ugly truth behind the masks of perfection they both tried to uphold in any public affair. But still even after the break up he still loved her. He found himself wishing for a miracle, something to help him turn back time to save himself and Sam from both of the endings she had endured that day. He was the last in the church.
Tears fell down his cheeks as he screamed. "Please someone give me a miracle turn back time and let me fix this. It was not meant to happen please help me, if you have any mercy and justice you will help" He cried finally falling into a silence that would be able to cut tension.
The room started to spin. Calvyn stood up in shock then quickly fell back to his grovelling knee position as a great voice echoed through the grand marble morgue.
"You have been granted this one wish Calvyn Clarke, I will turn back time 4 days, to the day of Samantha's death and this once allow you to try and fix what you broke. But I must warn you, some things are out of ones control and even though you may try with al your might there is always something that is altered with each act we commit in life and here in death. So go and try and save your loved one but remember the outcome may still prove fatal, she still may die and it will not be your fault. You will be the only one that remembers this and you will be the only one aware of the reverse of time, Good bye for now Calvyn" as suddenly as it had started it finished and the room continued in its vigorous spinning till everything went black.