What hurts the most

What hurts the most isn't not loving you.

It's not the fact we're not friends and we don't even talk.

Or that you are with her.

What hurts the most,

Is that you can't see me anymore.

I'm non-existent,

Barely there,

A bad presence as you so "tactfully" put it.

It hurts.

That you say this is my fault if you had given me,

Five minutes, not even,

You would have known.

Known that this is not what I wanted.

Not what I said, nor asked for.

All I wanted was to be your friend, or even acquaintance,

To not be awkward or bring up past memories and experiences.

All I wanted was you, even just a small piece of you.

Now you won't even look at me, give me the time of day even.

You used to say you would always care, always be there, no matter

what,

Everything we were,

Everything we meant is gone,

Now nothing, it means nothing.

You mean nothing,

It kills me inside,

It does.

You may not see it,

But it's there.

When you treat me like I'm dead,

A part of me died to,

Died along with us.

So it hurt, that is what hurts the most

You treating me like I'm dead.

I may be contradictory,

But it's what I need to say,

Need to say to you.

Maybe I will one day.

When I'm worth your time again

When it won't hurt,

But it always will,

You're what hurts the most