Heaven, so close
And yet so far away.
You held me in your arms
And I'd never felt such ecstasy
And now you shun me,
Playing with me
Giving me everything I've ever wanted one day
And denying me the next.
Playing with my emotions
How could you be so cruel?
But this doesn't stop me from wanting you.
Is it any wonder I turn to the bottle?
Any wonder why the pinprick of a needle can make me smile?
You're just another drug, darling,
And you know it, don't you?
Keeping me your willing slave
At your beck and call
Knowing that watching you
Is like being right outside heaven
And having the gate slammed shut in your face.
And watching you with her,
Well, that is worse then hell.
So I cut myself
To stop the bleeding
And hurt myself
To stop the pain.
It's just a downward spiral
You at the beginning,
And you at the end,
One I most likely, will never survive.
You're accepting me again,
And my heart has never felt so light
I know tomorrow that you will pretend I don't exist,
But that doesn't stop me from letting you use me tonight.
You are all I've ever wanted,
And it sickens me.
You're just another drug, darling
And I'm getting my last fix.
What good is heaven,
If you have to whore yourself to get it?
I'd rather take hell.