I just can't keep up

Or understand the way

That my life molds and morphs

Into what it is today

That for months at a time

I feel calm and content

And within hours of one day

I feel half dead and spent

And it's times like these

Where I stumble and I fall

That I begin to question

If this is worth it at all

Will tomorrow be different

Will it all just change back

Will something make up

For the strength that I lack

As the wheels steadily slow

And the gears stop in place

And the pain that shows true

Through this fake smile on my face

Will take hold of my life

And I will lose control

And give in to the torment

And let go of my fading soul

It's these people, THESE PEOPLE

These half-empty lives

That cut gashes in me

Like the sharpest of knives

That are doing me in

And stealing my power

That are bending

And breaking my mind by the hour

They want what I have

And they take what they can get

I want to fight back

So very badly, and yet

There's a part of me, waiting

Deep down inside

That wants me to give in

That can no longer hide

And it grabs at my throat

And slowly pulls me down

Like men lost at sea

I'm certain I'll drown

As the air leaves my lungs

And the light leaves my eyes

But I try to hide it

Behind this clever disguise

Of a man who still feels

Regret and remorse

But I've long given up

And let madness take its course

For you always fear

What you can't understand

As the world steals my life

From the palm of my hand

So when life seems dark

And you can no longer see

Remember my name

The person I used to call me

For by the time you have read this

I will no longer be

For this raging sea of emotion

Has all but drowned me