Reflections on Losing One's Virginity

There is a story my mother does not tell me.

Once,

We had just watched this movie,

And she had started crying.

She told my sister and me

About the man who

Broke her heart.

A couple of times,

I heard about a man whose

Heart she

Broke.

She does not tell us everything.


It's so cold.

Freezing, really.

It is just the cold,

The biting air,

That is causing my body to

Shake

And shake.

I never really understood the phrase

"knees giving way."

Now I hold onto whatever's nearby

To stand up.


At one point,

I was 8 or 9 or 10,

My dad mentioned he played

The clarinet

When he was 14.

I looked at him differently,

Thinking, I don't really know about his life

At all.

Then I started thinking,

What will I not tell my children?


I cry and I call and I talk and I sleep,

Hard,

As hard as I can,

Because I know that the next morning

Will bring questions

And looks

And explanations.

There are now two types of people –

Those who I will have to tell

And those who I will hide it from.

It's not obvious,

I guess

(not like that time he left that hickey

On my neck

And I had awkward conversations

For a week).

Maybe somehow I'll look different.

(and do I want to?)


My mother is not

Beautiful

When she cries.

I get it from her.

The Irish in our faces

The hyperventilating breaths

The blotchiness

The dampness

The swimming turquoise eyes.

She will never tell me everything


just like I will not tell my children

About this

About the pain

And the way your body felt on top of mine

(did it hurt where my fingernails dug into you?

Am I horrible to wish that it did?)

Or the way we avoided each other's eyes

And how we stopped

As I tried not to cry

And you tried not to hold me.

I will not tell them that

You didn't call.

I will not tell

Because I already know

That you won't either.