Your Mistakes

by, Cassandra

You are such a liar, honey.
You told me that I mattered,
(that my opinion mattered)
but it was just another lie.
You want me to stay quiet.

Just what would you do
if I told you how I really feel?
(would you still love me?)
Because turning back time
is something I'm not able to do.

And each day that passes by
makes the longing build inside.
(and I can't just run and hide.)
I'm so close to letting it all spill
and ranting till I've had my fill.

I've kept quiet far too long
and this time it's gone too far.
(you can't force my hand in this.)
I refuse to risk all that I am
for one moment of fleeting bliss.

I'm scared you'll never hear me,
even if I screamed every word inside.
(would you be shocked, awed?)
I can't lie and say I feel the same
and keep supporting your mistakes.

We've been through this all before.
Don't you remember, love?
(you do. you cried.)
Why do you want to relive
the hell of days gone by?

How many hearts are ours to break?
Because I fear we're losing track quickly.
(and I can't, I won't be abandoned again.)
You can't ask this of me, you've no right.
I have the privilege of keeping my heart whole.

Or as whole as it can be
with all its many breaks.
(you're to blame for most of them.)
I can't keep up this losing game.
I'm losing the will heal again.

Don't judge me now.
Do whatever you want,
(but don't expect me to)
cause this is your mistake
and I won't be a part of it.