"Call me crazy, but I've always wanted to corrupt a Catholic girl. Just a pretty little virgin thing in a short skirt, a blue plaid skirt. And a white dress shirt. Throw in a loose tie. It's the cherry on top. The cherry that's about to be popped.
I could never tell you exactly why I was so fascinated with this one girl in particular. Maybe it was the white socks she wore high up those marble legs. It could've been that skirt that no other girl looked so good in. The way the fabric curved around a perfectly plump, shapely ass. I liked to imagine she wore no panties underneath that skirt. It was so beautiful, it'd be a shame to take off to get to the holy land.
I could only imagine what she hid from the world behind a sweater. But the rest was enough. And I haven't even reached her face yet. My eyes are slow, forgive me.
Her eyes were like the rarest gems that held the ocean in their heart. Her face was as perfect ivory. How lovely her skin was. To caress it would be to touch things even angels haven't touched. And devils have burned in hell for corrupting. Call me a devil, but she was my angel. I always longed to kiss those red lips, run my fingers through her long, dark hair, and take her to a place where right and wrong are merely concepts, and it can't be wrong if it feels so right.
My lady. My love. My adore. My own Lenore. But her name was Sarah. And in heavy breaths I whispered it to the night when I was all alone.
In dreams, she gave herself to me. In reality, I gave myself to her. For years she never knew. That's all about to change.
My name is Paul. I am seventeen years old, unpopular, and unloved. Tomorrow morning I am going to bring a gun to school. By the end of the day, I will be dead. This is my last will and testament to the world. By the time you read it, I will already be dead, along with several of my fellow classmates. The rest of the world won't care to understand me, but if you've read this far, then you are one of the few who do.
They will call me a monster for what I am about to do, and what I have already done, when you read this. Aren't we all. In a world of monsters, it takes a monster to survive, and live his life through with some meaning. Do-good-ers get done bad, and get dead real quick. I suppose my life is only to last another day, but I won't die lying to myself. I'll die showing the world what's been going on in my mind for years, when I was pretending to be somebody else. The quiet kid that nobody talked to. The smart kid who always was willing to share homework. I guess I expected something in return. I guess I was wrong.
No, I wasn't bullied like the most bullied kid in our school. No, my parents didn't beat me as a child. Hell, they had trouble remembering I was there half the time. And no, I don't have psychological issues. I'm just being honest, for once in my life. I'll show the truth to each of my fellow students: with a loaded weapon. And once and for all, the world will know who I am.
Who are you? Why have you read this far?
Live your life through the coming years when I would have lived mine as a lie. Live every day of it. You may find yourself lying to. You're too afraid to show the world what your made up of. Well I'm not. I'm telling the world tomorrow, a future for me as I write, a past for you as you read. I'm telling the world who I am. And they will not forget."