I got a secret note today,

Wrapped with secret words and letters,

With secret wishes and wants

That you can't see because they are secret.

As I watch the blank page

I wait for the secrets to reveal themselves

To become unwrapped in whatever

Parallel dimension they exist in

And tell me all the answers.

I got a secret note today

That only said

From: Secret Admirer.

Who the heck is Secret Admirer!

I looked him up in all the phone books,

Searched for him in Saturn's rings,

But so far I haven't found him

And I'm beginning to doubt if he exists.

My friend told me I was being

Too literal,

It was just another name

For My Lover,

But who the heck is My Lover?

I looked him up too.

He doesn't exist either.

But now I think I'm starting to

See a bright light.

Perhaps Secret means

He doesn't want to say who

He is, what he wants.

He doesn't want to tell me anything

But tease me like I'm teasing him,

In secret.

The light gets closer, brighter

But I know his purpose,

I tell me and myself.

He wants me to know that he likes me,

But he doesn't want to tell me,

I guess.

Maybe he's afraid of rejection, refusal

That might happen, but he's gotta take a chance.

Maybe it's like raw eggs.

You might live if you eat them,

But you never know.

He just doesn't want to eat the eggs.

The light gets closer

Then blinds me as I think,

But I taste good scrambled.

Does he want me as

Scrambled Eggs?

Wait, it's making sense!

If I am Scrambled Eggs,

That means that Secret Admirer

Stands for…

Uggh….. I really don't like him

I guess he just ate those raw eggs

And died. Really died. No-chance-of-revival died

I got a secret note today,

Whose sender just died of

Salmonella.