French Quotes

I was sorting trough my high school papers and I came across my old planner. I opened it and was reading trough some of the things I wrote in it, and I came across some quotes me and my friend made each week when we were board in French class( We really hated our French teacher as you will be able to tell). Here are some of the really humorous quotes I found from 8th grade.

"T: What's with all this dead air over here! All you have to do is do your homework and you get an easy 100 so why don't you kids just do it!"

"Don't hate French,

Hate the teacher."

"T: Oh look a valentine! I hope I get more by the end of today.

S: It will be the only one you get today!"

"We go into French to learn,

and we come out with no knowledge."

"T: What's wrong with you kids! You're either dead or bouncing of the walls! Is it a full moon or something!"

Hunting Hillbillies

There were 3 hillbillies that decided to go hunting. Two of them were smart guys that knew how to go hunting and the other one was a dumb guy who didn't know how to go hunting. They meet up in the middle of the woods by a trail. The first smart guy goes out and comes back with a deer. The dumb guy said, " Where'd ya get the deer?". The smart guy said, "I see tracks, I follow tracks, I get deer." The second smart guy goes out and comes back with a moose. The dumb guy said, " Where'd ya get moose?". The smart guy said, "I see tracks, I follow tracks, I get moose." So the dumb guy goes out and comes back all beat up. The smart guys said, "Why ya'll beat up?". The dumb guy replied, "I see tracks, I follow tracks, I get hit by a train."

Telemarketer Jokes

If you are sick of telemarketers think about trying something like these!

1.)I was home sick, trying to get to sleep, and the phone just kept ringing, and ringing, and ringing, and ringing, and ringing, and ringing, and ringing, and ringing, and ringing and I just got feed up with it so I answered the phone.

Home sick : "Hello"

Male Telemarketer: "Hello, I am from AOL and I would like to sell you the next version of AOL…"

Home sick : "Hello"

Male Telemarketer: "Um, yes, Hello, I am from AOL and I would like to sell you the next version of …"

Home sick : "What color is your underwear?"

Male Telemarketer: "Excuse me?"

Home sick : "Are you wearing a thong?"

Male Telemarketer: "ph…(phone click)…beep, beep, beep…"

Now they will leave me alone for a while or AOL will never call me back because of what I did to the one salesperson.

2.) I was at my friend house to spend the night and her mom went down town to get our pizza and movies for that evening. So we were at her house alone with my friends younger sister until my friends mom got home. The phone rang and my friend went and picked it up and put it on speaker phone.

My Friend: "Ello! May I ask whose calling?"

Female Telemarketer: " My name is Jessie and I'm calling in behave of a new type of cable that will soon be in your area…"

Me: "Us hillbillies looove food are you selling cookies."

Young sis: "Yehaw Clem! I like cookies! Are we getting some?"

Female Telemarketer: "No I'm not selling cookies! I'm selling cable!"

My Friend: "Eh Clem waz Kay-ple? Is it food?"

Female Telemarketer: "No, No, No! It's cable. Not Kay-ple. It's for your television!"

Me: "No Martha it is not food! It's called kay-ple and it's for your telev…tel…tel-e-v-ision!"

Young sis: "Do we have tel-e-v-sion Clem?"

Me: "Hey Martha! Do we have tel-e-v-sion?"

Female Telemarketer: "…(phone click)…beep, beep, beep…"

It's amazing what us teenagers do to get a kick out of things!

3.)I was at my house just fooling around because it was a snow day and the phone rang. I ran up stair and answered the phone.

Me: "Hello!"

Female Telemarketer: "Hi I am from…"

Me: "Helloooo!"

Female Telemarketer: "Oh hello sweetie can you put your mommy or daddy on the phone?"

Me: "No silly!"

Female Telemarketer: "Why not honey?"

Me: " Because my mommy's in the shower and my daddy's mowing the lawn!"

Female Telemarketer: "He's mowing the law in the snow?"

Me: "Yeah! My daddy's a little messed up."

Female Telemarketer: "Well can I speak to your mommy then?"

Me: "How many times do I have to tell you lady! She is in the shower!"

Female Telemarketer: "Well I'll call back later!"

Me: "Okay crazy lady! Bye!"

Female Telemarketer: "Bye!"

Me: "Bye!"

Female Telemarketer: "Bye!"

Me: "Bye!"

Female telemarketer: "Bye! … (phone click)…beep, beep, beep…"

It's amazing how dumb some people are when they can't tell a 3 year old from a 13 year old.