By Venustas iaceo and kyriaasimi
Konstantin 'Kostya' Isaak Ivankov's P.O.V.:
I let my dogs outside, and as soon as I let them out I feel the heat of the sun wash over me through my black sleeves. Even inside, the clothes were too hot to the point that I actually felt the need to remove my shirt. I took off the knives I keep on my arms, inspecting the burn marks from years ago before covering them with medical bandages up to my shoulders. The white of the bandages is more comfortable to me as I lay back on top of the blanket, changing my mind and deciding to get up and find a vent before a knock comes to my window that draws my attention.
I walk over and unlock the window, cringing at the heat invited inside as Leone climbs through, his blonde hair sweaty and sticking to his face more than usual. He still has his coat on, however, and I can't really figure out why. The memory of the last time I saw him flashes back into my head, and I suddenly feel like I want my shirt even as I close the window again. "I don't know how you can wear your jacket in this heat and still climb to the roof. We have a door." I lock the window and turn back around to him.
"I feel naked without my jacket, and useless without the stuff in it. Besides, I don't know who would answer your door. I figured it would be safer." He's the only person I know that would consider climbing to a roof safer than knocking on a door. Desya would have let him in. If Pasha were here, he'd have answered the door. I'd have answered the door. None of us are a threat.
"If you say so," I say, taking a seat over the vent, leaving my shirt lay on the bed next to the medical bandages. I don't think I could bring myself to put it back on, and the thought makes me blush at little when I realize he's seen me without it anyways. "So, why are you here?"
He shifts as if he doesn't know what to say, or at the very least doesn't want to tell me what he has to say. I'm not sure if I like either possibility. I lower my head, thinking of the most likely reason he's shown up. I'm still looking up at him through my hair and over my sunglasses, doing my best to hide my eyes. I'm unable to hide my frown and disappointed tone. "Are you going to stop being my friend?"
Through my hair, I notice the clear surprised expression on his face, and it calms me down, but his suddenly exclamations don't help. One moment he yells "What? No!" and then he yells "Yes!" before deciding on, "Of course I'm still your friend."
"So you still like me… even after…?" I can't bring myself to say it, already feeling my face on fire just thinking about what happened. It took awhile after the drugs wore off, but eventually I came to remember almost everything that happened, in rather vivid detail. From Leone's blush, it looks like he did too.
Leone takes off his coat and holds onto it, pacing back and forth with a nervous stride. "Uhm, about that – "
"Yes, Leo?" I say, feeling my face grow a little hotter. I hadn't expected him to want to talk about it, but I sort of want to talk about it. Then again, a large part of me also does not want to talk about it.
"Nothing," he says, looking at his coat as he continues to pace across the room. Leone stops pacing, and he looks at me. "Are you mad at me?"
I shake my head no, and force a smile at him. "No. I'm not mad. That was just to learn, right?"
"Right, right," he says as if he's trying to assure himself. "I mean, right."
"I don't think I learned," I comment as I look at him. "I mean, with the drugs, it's hard to tell. What do you think? Well, I mean, afterwards, in the morning, was kind of…" I don't know how to say enlightening in his language. He looks petrified. For once, he seems at a loss for words. Leone usually doesn't shut up. There's definitely something wrong. "Leo?"
"I – I don't know. I guess I don't think I learned either," he says. He takes a seat on my bed and stares at the floor. Just like shutting up, I don't recall ever seeing Leone look at the floor. He usually looks above his head if anything.
"Well," I say, trying to figure out as I talk how to voice my opinion without frightening him further, "I think the only way to learn would be to try again." If I ever stopped blushing, I know for sure that I'm blushing again just at the thought of letting what happened before happen again.
Leone blushes as well and stumbles out, "Well, I guess you're right. Why? Would you want to figure it out? I mean…" He trails off, and I'm just blushing harder.
I feel the need to look away, deciding to look at the window as I say, "If… you would? I could always try again with someone else."
"Wait, you decided to try again?" he says, sounding startled. I send a glance and notice he's looking at me now before snapping my head to be looking at the window again.
"Y-yes. I, uh, I think I liked what happened. Maybe," I mumble, wincing as I talk. I can't help but look over at Leone when he's quiet for a moment, noticing him blushing.
He's staring at the ground again before his voice softens, and his voice softens. "I might have liked what happened, too."
"Do you want to try again?" I ask, inspecting the spot on the floor that his eyes have been glued to.
"Well, yeah, if, maybe," he stutters out as if he's not sure what to say.
"Yeah, I would," he decides, and for some reason I can't help but to smile.
"Do you want to try again with me?" He just nods to my question, drawing another one from me as I smile. "When?"
"I don't know," he says as I feel the need to walk over to him. I sit down next to him on the bed and lean over so that I'm partially blocking his view of the floor.
He looks scared, and I can't help but feel worried for my friend as I give a smile to inform him that everything is alright. "Are you okay?"
He looks up at me and gives me a small smile. "I'm fine, Konstantin. Don't worry." I nod at him because of the smile and something drives me to deliver a kiss to his cheek.
"Okay. If you say so."
We don't do anything for a bit before he leans over and brushes his lips over mine, drawing the embarrassment back under my cheeks mixed with a dash of guilt for my friend having kissed me. I smile at him despite the feeling, choosing to ignore it a moment before resting a hand on his chest and leaning to kiss him back. I want the kiss to go deeper, but I can't bring myself to do it and it seems as if he can't either.
Our lips do start to move against one another's though in a slow pattern. He puts his hand onto my arm, and his other one wraps around my waist, pulling me closer to him as the kiss continues, making the coat drop to the floor to be forgotten. We keep kissing for awhile, but not once do our lips part enough for our mouths to connect as much as I want them to. Instead, the guilty feeling just rides up further until I pull back. "I don't think I can do this right now," I say.
"Yeah," he agrees, making me feel a lot calmer even though he still has me pressed against him. It's as if we're whispering so close to each other's faces we might as well still be kissing. He lets go, and he stands up, leaning over still so our faces are still close. "Maybe I should go." He leans over and kisses my cheek, something he's not done before.
I blush and grab my cheek as I look at him. He still hasn't moved back. "American boys don't do that."
"Yeah, I know," he says, blushing. I lean in and kiss the blush on his cheekbone, smiling at him. "Well, goodbye, Konstantin. I'll see ya later." He turns around to go, and I feel sad. I don't want him to leave.
"You don't have to go yet," I say. I won't stop him if he wants to leave. I'm not even sure why I don't want him to go.
He turns to look at me, a questioning look in his eyes. "I don't?" I shake my head no at him, and he hesitates before walking back over. He stands in front of me and his hand presses into my shoulder as he kisses me this time, something different about the way he kisses, and I feel safe opening my mouth to lick his lips. He accepts the change of kiss, my tongue massaging against his as he leans me back on the bed. He breaks the kiss to give me a cheeky grin. "Are you sure I don't have to go?"
I blush and stick out my tongue, but he steals back into another kiss. I decide to use what experience I have, which I know is more than him, to deepen the kiss so much he lets off a soft noise of appreciation while my fingertips slide down his chest. He stops to take a breath as I scratch his stomach, leaning to whisper in his ear. "Go ahead and leave if you want," I say, trying to sound seductive. "I mean, you can leave all alone if that's what you want."
He narrows his eyes at me and smiles as I kiss his jaw. "Well, if you're going to be that way, then I'm going to have to stay."
"Fine," I say, purposely sounding as if his choice makes no difference whatsoever before licking his ear.
"Now why would you go and do that?" he says with a smirk, sounding breathy as I decide to kiss lower until I pull myself further back in the bed, inviting him to lay down on top of me, something he takes without prompting.
"I don't know what you mean," I reply before nipping at his collarbone, kissing it a moment. "What did I do?"
"I wonder. What did you do?" he says, narrowing his eyes a little at me again. I kiss his jaw once more before me mutters the word 'tease' against my own shoulder. He gives a small breathy laugh and I lean forward to kiss him, making it deep again, this time grinding my hips upwards against his and causing him to let out a gasp at the indirect contact.
"I am not," I protest between kisses, grinding up to do it again, longer this time until I feel him doing it back.
"Yeah," he says, panting a little. "Sure."
"You want me to stop?"
"I didn't say that," he says a bit singsong before we start to kiss again. The kissing gets hotter, and we both start to shed clothing about the floor. My former shirt and bandages fall to the ground with a sweep of his arm as he keeps up the constant movements against me. His hand brushes down to touch me just once before he looks up. "Konstantin, do you remember how to do this?"
"N-…not perfectly," I say, breathy now as well from all the friction, this time welcoming the heat despite my former discomfort.
"Th-that's what I thought," he says, and we kiss once more before I grind against him again, still reveling in the feel of skin against skin despite the confusion we both have fallen into.
"I think we need that… that one stuff…" I can't remember what I'm trying to say, but I know it didn't feel very comfortable at first.
He looks at me as he presses a leg between mine, causing me to let out a small gasp before going, "You room with a gay kid, don't you?"
"Yeah, but he's not home," I reply, looking at him. "Why? Are you going to ask him?"
"No," he says before kisses me. "I'm going to steal his that one stuff." He lets out a moan as I reach my hand down to stroke between his thighs a couple times, distracting him from our need for a moment.
"Should we both go?" I whisper, not sure why I'm whispering but I can't bring myself to speak out loud as he's panting in my ear. He nods, and we regress back into chaste kisses for minute before we both find ourselves in now uncomfortable boxers slipping down the hallway towards Desya's room.
He spins around once to press me against the wall, grinding against me so hard that I wish we didn't have to walk all this way. When we reach Desya's room, Leone stops for a split second before digging through the draw next to bed and pulling out a bottle of lubricant and condom packages. I blink a little and squint as I pick one up. "What do you want this for?"
"You're kidding me, right Konstantin?"
"No? I've never had to use one of these before."
A little bit of worry crosses Leone's face before he says, "All the more reason I'm using it now."
I snicker as I push myself against him, undoing the package for one and dangling it in his face, laughing all out before kissing his cheek. "I don't know how to put this on."
"Do they teach you nothing in Russia?" he says and I pout at him.
"I heard that English men are unable to have children because they …masturbate?... too early," I say.
"I am downright offended by that. I'm glad I'm only half English," he says with a smile before I turn his head and start to kiss him, still holding the annoying latex he seems to want me to put on. He pushes me down against Desya's bed, and I don't protest because he's making contact with me again. He kisses me one more time and leans over me with an almost predatory grin. "So what do you know about Italians?"
"I don't think I know anything about Italians," I inform, and his grin widens.
"Good, then I can show you the other half."
Leone's arms are draped around my shoulders and he's collapsed with his face against my neck. My rectum is shooting waves up my spine even after the sex is finished, and we both seem to be trying to regain our breath from one another. I go to move to pull off the latex, but as soon as I bend the waves turn into pain, and I let out a slight hiss even though I take it off anyways and put it on its package on the nightstand. "Ow," I vocalize, and Leone gives a slight chemical-induced laugh.
He smiles at me as he keeps laughing, rubbing his face against my shoulder. "I feel your pain." I give a sigh, and I lean down just because I hate the feel of it against me and remove his condom as well, not helping his attempts to breath any even though my breath is already mostly under my control. He just shifts to get comfortable and squeezes me. "So, are you sure now?"
"Yeah, the only thing I didn't like is sitting on their wrappers."
"Good because I'm sure, too," he says with the smile still on his face. "The only problem now is what does that sureness mean?"
"For me? That I like boys and girls. That was the point," I inform him, and he looks slightly disappointed.
"That's not exactly what I meant."
"I'm sorry," I say, running my fingers through his hair and swiping some of it out of his eyes repetitively, smiling at him. He makes a noise best described like the noise a purring cat would make and rubs against me, leaning into the movement. "What did you mean?"
"Are we still friends?"
"Do you not want to be friends?" I ask, confused. Maybe he hates me now, but he doesn't seem like he hates me. He seems really happy.
"Of course I do. The question is, is that all we are?"
"I think so," I tell him after debating the question. "Why?"
"I don't know," he says as I continue to run my fingers through his shaggy blonde hair. "I was just wondering, I guess."
"Well, do you want to be more than friends? Really, I never thought about."
He closes his eyes as I kiss his forehead before whispering, "I don't know. All of my past attempts at relationships haven't gone over so well, or, you know, at all."
"That's okay," I say in a quiet tone, giving a small laugh before rubbing my thumb across his cheek. "I just don't have them."
"Oh, well, okay," he says, a sad note to his words that makes me wonder for a moment just how he took my comment, if I said it wrong.
"It's not that I don't want to. I just haven't found someone I like."
"I go to dance clubs. The people I meet aren't there for personality. I haven't known any of them."
"Well, you know me," he says, seeming to perk up a bit, looking a little hopeful. I think I get what's going on now. "What do you think of me?"
I laugh and playfully punch him in the arm. "What do I think of you? I can barely understand you." I smile at him.
He smiles back. "You can barely understand me, huh? Then what are you doing here in bed with me?"
"You weren't saying much before I ended up in bed with you," I tease, laughing a small bit before the severity of this request hits me. I give him a serious look, and he doesn't seem to know what to think. "Really though, I don't know how I feel about you. I can't say for sure. I don't want to ruin our friendship."
Leone nods his head, and I wrap an arm around him, finally holding him back like he's decided to do to me. "Well, okay, easier question: how do you feel about this happening again?"
I think I'm blushing as I start to think about how this felt with him, and I fidget a little before looking at him. "I… wouldn't mind if this happened again."
"That's good, 'cause I don't think I'd mind either," he says with content smile on his face. I lean down, and I kiss him chastely on the lips for the smile. "But that'll change our friendship anyways, won't it? So, do you want to try or do you want to just leave it be or see what happens?"
I think about it, both of us going silent for awhile, before I smile at him, leaning forward to kiss him again. "I'll try."