"Forgiveness"

You're just badly executed sarcasm
In a very sad song,
And I don't think I care in the slightest.
The words inside me do not suit my mood.
Your smile always lit up their days
Whilst mine only confused them,
And neither of us reached the desired effect.

I lived in a thin shadow,
Cleasing myself until I bled.
Drenched in your light, I always
Thought I wanted to absorb it.
But once pain evaporates
And slowly becomes a sensation,
I think it's more fun just to laugh.

I won't starve myself for days.
I won't keep tearing up my face.
I won't cringe swallowing the peroxide.
Tell me, am I better yet? Will I ever be?
I can bleed and become hollow.
I no longer hate you
Because I no longer am you.