don't tell me i'm strong
because i don't fit into the world of
super thin models
super thin actors
super thin room mates
with their
size-double-zero-jeans-are-too-big-for-me figures.

i'm weak.

i can't give up the urge to eat
and i can't stop eating.
the hunger feels so nice
but just one peanut butter cracker
and all that work is gone to waste

because one cracker leads to two
and two lead to four
and of course, i'm not
easing up on the peanut butter

so i get fatter and fatter
or atleast,
not any skinnier
and i'm stuck with these
size five hips
and this
"large" upper body.

and all that matters now
is being skinny
(isn't that the way you want me?)