Mandabeater:

Instalment One

-

-

-

The huge crowd applauded, the makeshift stage platform vibrating with their shouts of praise. The new democratically elected leader of the country stood up smiling and waving as the shouts grew and the feeling of possible pandemonium could be felt in the air.

A single upraised hand quelled the noise instantly.

"Thank you all so very much. I've been waiting for this moment for many, many years. This is the pinnacle of my goals. Now on to business that you've all waited so anxiously to hear.

"As of this moment, this country is closed to all multinational corporations. We refuse to simply surrender the labour of our people for practically nothing! We will become self-sufficient. It will be difficult but I assure you, we can do it!"

The speech continued, sporratic applause breaking out at every pause and ending every time the new leader opened her mouth. The crowd was captivated by her very presence, and three people watched the scene from a live feed in a heavily riot-guarded area.

"Who would have thought this would ever have happened?"

"Well what do you expect. Small but clever, she never gave up on her highschool ideals."

"Did we really expect her to? No, she's Mandy! We should never have expected less."

Just then the three women caught the last part Mandy's speech. "From this moment on, I am disbanding the cabinet, and all parliment. We are a dictatorship, but never fear! I will never stop taking the advice of the populous. What would we do without you?!"

To the surprise of the three VIP spectators this announcement brought just as much cheer as the rest of the speech combined.

"Good or bad?" the first asked.

"Both?"

"Neither?"

All three shrugged.

But how did this all happen you might ask? Well this is how it unfolded. The uncensored life of Mandy, currently know as Mandabeater.

She was a generous girl, always caring and quiet and rather shy, but only for a moment... or seven. She had strong opinions, especially in geopolitcs. She refused to believe that the world is an uncaring place, completely focused on money and not the well-being of their fellows of the human race. World peace was Mandy's goal. World peace and complete equality. But then one day an event occurred that would completely eclipse Mandy's plans of life.

Lyssa a dear, dear friend and self-proclaimed matchmaker, decided that after a recent break-up Mandy needed a new romantic interest. Said new romantic interest was ironically enough an ex-romantic interest turned friend of dear, dear Lyssa.

Dear, dear Lyssa had a 'plan' to make these two realize that the single most important thing in their young lives was each other's company. Sadly, things did not go quite as planned.

Now we must understand that Mandy was quite an organized girl. She had plans, and a path to get there, not to mention her wonderfully colour coded agenda, and impeccable reputation of never-late school work. This new/ex romantic interest was not something Mandy had planned for, not that she was against him either, but it just wasn't something she was interested in at the moment.

Said boy was in every way the gentleman, opening doors and such, spreading coats over puddles and what not, and being very intelligent and quite the opposite of every smelly-boy specimen this writer has ever heard of. He was an impeccable choice. Most depressingly this was not the type of boy Mandy wanted, although she didn't know this at the moment. It was a subconscious urge for something completely out of the ordinary that she could never quite identify.

So Mandy tired valiantly to dissuade dear, dear Lyssa and the boy, Dan-Dan (like Tin-Tin but not really) but was unsuccessful in her attempts. Slowly our beloved Mandy began to fall into a horrible pattern of possible destruction.

The colour-codedness of her agenda started to fade. She would forget important due-dates, and her usually impressive projects were showing a little less of her creative juices. Dan-Dan tried in vain to encourage her to go back to colour coding and spending excessive amounts of time on her projects but the more he gently encouraged, the more our loveable gentle Mandy resisted, a passion growing inside her.

One fine summer's day when Mandy and friends: dear, dear Lyssa, nutty Steph, studious Jezebel, and newyique Chelle were out for a luncheon date, a formidable gang of bikers pulled up beside the restaurant. Mandy stared eagerly after them, suddenly in a mood to rebel for dear, dear Lyssa was once again talking ceaselessly about Dan-Dan, and how worried he was about Mandy. Mandy rose suddenly from the patio table and stalked to the center of the gang. All four stared after her, three with horrified expressions, newyique Chelle shouting encouragements.

"Rebel Mandy, REBEL!!!!!!!! REBEL!! WHOO HOOO!! Heh, heh. She's rebelling guys! YES!"

Mandy ran quickly back over to the table stopping only to grab her purse much to the shock and horror of the horrified three. Newyique Chelle was glad to see her do something impulsive. "Keep in touch bella!"

"CHELLE!!" an angry chorus sem-drowned her words.

"Girls, I have just met a completely crazy spastic genius."

A previous vision jumped into Chelle's head and out her big mouth. "Is he going to demolish your perfect agenda?"

"Uh... I don't uh really know. But goodbye!" Then she was off.

That was the end of generous, always caring and quiet and rather shy, but only for a moment... or seven, Mandy.

Her life as Mandabeater had begun.

It had been many moons since Mandy had shacked up with the biker gang, been outfitted in an electric blue leather outfit, and had told her story.

Her crazy spastic genius had indeed completely demolished her colour-coded agenda and taught her to live in the moment, not that she did very often, she was still cautious.

Now after hearing Mandy-sorry, Mandabeater's story, and listening to her speak and comfort and advise them, they gang had elected her their honorary leader, and they worshiped the petite Mandabeater as a god. Or goddess rather.

After eventually understanding her story the bikers decided that they should avenge Mandabeater for the injustice that was forced upon her and they rode back to her home town to find this Dan-Dan. Sadly they found that poor Dan-Dan had been tragically maimed in a horrible llama accident. He and dear, dear Lyssa had been testing a new 10-llama cart which had overturned and Dan-Dan had been trampled by the 10 upset llamas... and the cart. He was currently in a mental facility helping him overcome his all-consuming anger towards dear, dear Lyssa. The gang decided that was enough punishment for him with Mandy assuring them he did nothing wrong. Why he was targeted we shall never know, he was simply a pawn in the larger chess game of life...

Dear, dear Lyssa herself, was in another institution, one not much advertised, or even mentioned at all. It was a facility where the government raised secret half human half assorted animal DNA children. These children were then sent off to select families and their reactions to society and the reactions of those around them to them were carefully monitored. How this was therapeutic for dear, dear Lyssa, since she was only able to express all her feelings to living beings who would not even pretend to understand, we will also never know.

Well after finding out such horrible news the gang retired, as per the now exhausted goddess Mandabeater's request, to a secluded kibbutz on the new-found volcanically created island country which now remembers no other name than: Manda-try,

('try' like tree as in the last syllable of country. Get it? Huh? huh? Ok It was over your head, read on!)

Now Mandabeater slowly grew to realize that her hate of multinational corporations was well-based and she funded a group of incredibly organized pacifistic-terrorists to work for her, and develop her election platform. She was always one for doing things legally Mandy was.

Now, after many long years of work, she had been fairly elected, and had invited her remaining close friends, studious Jezebel, now the first female president of the United States of America, nutty Steph, happily doing...Steph-ish stuff around the world with her devoted man at her heels, and newyique Chelle, a still struggling writer failing miserably but enjoying every minute of it and life, at least thats what the analysts said...

"Well what did you girls think?"

"Mandy, it was great. I'm so proud of you! See what rebelling can do?"

"Chelle! That is no way to greet a fellow world leader. Mandy, I hope you plan on helping the US in every way you can?"

"Uh...um... Steph!! How are you?"

"Just find Mandy. My red-cross work is going marvelous and you are doing marvelous too! I'm so HAPPY!!" and she broke into a wordless song.

"Well I'm glad you're all here, because I have some news, and I know that all of you will be able to help me."

"Sure Mandy, Mandabeater, Ms. President, whatever you're going by these days. Shoot!"

"Thank you Chelle. Well girls, I need your help." she sighed deeply. "I need your help to take over the world."

There was a collective intake of breath.

"For World Peace of course!" she said looking at each of them hopefully. Just then a large BANG occured and half the ceiling fell in, and in with it came...

"Dear, dear Lyssa!! EEEE!!!" Mandy ran to hug her, completely oblivious to the form of her entrance.

"I am here to help you Mandy, to make up for my past actions. AND I have brought my army of animalistic children." She stood militantly off to the side, in complete guerrilla attire, looking like some odd, odd 'sexually-appealing' female troop leader from a Z-movie. Apparently the governments had lost control of the experimental station...

"Weird..." whispered the three guests as Mandabeater turned back to them.

"So are you going to help with World Peace or what?"

THE END


Ok, so this is a little rambling scenario that I came up with about a few friends. It's meant to be sarcastic and nutty, and not make any sense at all. It's meant to be fun! So have FUN!!

I hope you enjoy. This was completely odd, because it was sparked by a very odd conversation in which I rambled for quite a while. Hope you had a laugh, or stretched your face with a few odd face gestures!

G'bye!