A/N: THANK YOU FOR YOUR REVIEWS!!! They keep me going yeah :D And don't keep back with the criticisms, throw them in whenever you can. Am UBER glad that people are actually reading :'D

Chapter Two: And so…


Now I swear that the most amazing thing is happening to me, ever. In my hand there is an uberly, crumpled poor little thing with the heading "ITINERARY" and there is a map at the bottom.


1st Day

7.00 am Flight boarding – Sydney Airport

15.00 pm Touchdown – Bangkok International Airport

16.00 pm Brief talk, basic rules explained

16.30 pm Boat ride across Chao Phraya

19.00 pm Checking-in, campsite – Muay Si Thai

20.00 pm Dinner

21.00 pm Lights off! Toodles

2nd Day

7.00 am Breakfast

8.00 am Jungle-trekking across Mount Doi Inthanon (note: bring notebook, pen)

9.00 am….

From then on the everything else is barred from my mind. My focus is on that line.

8.00 am Jungle-trekking across Mount Doi Inthanon (note: bring notebook, pen)

Because that is the time zone I am in now. It's the second freaking day of the school trip, and it's 8.30 am. By default I would be hauling my backpack along with 50 other school fellow mates and trudging up Do-Ee-In-The-None, or whatever, singing 'It's a Small World'. But NO.

Instead I am living the most amazing moment of my life walking alone on the muddy tracks of a huge, LIVING rainforest while holding a penknife in case a white tiger attacks. Or a huge male Haeinenteria ghilianii jumps up at me.

Now I relive the last half-hour that has passed me by.

First I came out of that moth-ridden wooden treehouse they made me pay $360 for. Then we sort of followed this native into the Burmese mountains. I happened to notice an exotic, tropical organism that excited my Scientific nerves and prompted me to slow down and take a quick sketch of it. Only to have it fly away. Then?!

I stop in my tracks. Then--NOW.


I quickly calm down my central nervous system and do some rapid, decisive thinking. I swing my backpack off my shoulder, squat down on the wet, humid floor and unzip the opening. Penknife, check. Torchlight, check. Medical kit, check. Water, check. Itinerary with map, absolutely comfortingly check. Notebook and pen. Nothing useful, but may turn out helpful. And my phone!!!! Damn!! I left it back with Luke.

I whip out the penknife and zip the bag again before swinging it over my shoulder. Now all that's left is to find the way out, since I seem to have barely entered the forsaken forest.

Okay. Now where do I start?

Feeling extremely stupid, I turn around and begin to push my way through the muddy ground infested with leeches and giant millipedes, walking straight without turning back. My instincts tell me that the entrance is just yonder…I only have to walk.

Suddenly I hear some rustling behind me and I quicken my pace, not wanting to be the lunch of whatever that is behind me.

"OI!! KIKIBE!!!"

I swing around violently, losing my balance and falling headfirst into a very brown and golden thing behind me.

"Owwwwwwwww…you bitch!!"

I look up to see a close-up view of my worst nightmare-inducer, Todd McDee. I push him and he falls the second time into the worm-infested mud, yelping, and I stand up, brushing the dirt away. Relief seeps through me, because I know that – I will be saved. The most-amazing-thing-that-has-ever-happened-to-me is now over.

"You f ucking bitch!! Owww….you're the worst…" Todd pushes himself up and howls like a retarded animal while rubbing his ass. "It's as painful as you're ugly!!"

"I don't give a damn." I watch him coolly. "Where are the others? Did they send you to take me?"

"What the hell are you talking about?!! OWW!!" He hops around in little circles while pulling mud out of his hair. "That's my line!"

"Huh?" I ask, baffled. Suddenly I feel something creeping into me and my internal body temperature takes an adventurous plunge. "You mean…"

"Mean what??!! Hell, I was lost for the whole past 45 minutes!! I went to take a pee and I got stranded!! You bitches didn't even realize I was missing???!!" He asks, frowning and incomprehensively pointing at my face.

"Haha." I laugh. "Hahahaha."

"What??!!" He asks, confused. "Stop fooling around…now where are the others??!!"

I turn around and begin walking again. He follows quickly behind. The situation has just developed for the worse because now I am officially stranded with the person-no-animal I hate most in my life. "Oh, shuddup, dimwit. We're lost." I turn around to observe his reaction.

"Lost?" He asks, wide-eyed, stopping.

"Lost." I nod, not stopping.

"Lost?" He asks again, still in the same position.

"Lost." I face front again, walking faster.

Three seconds later I hear an animalistic "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" behind me and I close my eyes.

This is going to be the longest day ever.


By 19.35 pm I knew the day was going to Uncle Peter's asshole.

1. We still hadn't found our way out.

2. We still hadn't found our way out.

3. Ooh. Are those sounds of some hungry, ferocious animal...or just the wind. Ooh. Tigers. Ooh.

4. We need a place to sleep in, I mean totally need a place!! Food!! We absolutely need that too. Where's UNICEF when you need them?

5. Owhhh!! Of all the people I had to get lost with, I end up with Kikibe. Now we'll be screaming each other out everyday until we get out…that is, (gulp) if we ever get out.

As much as I hate to admit it, Kikibe's braini-ness comes in as perfectly helpful now.

But what is up with that farcehead??!! He's just walking, walking, walking.

I mean we're not even quarrelling. Not that he makes a good shout-buddy, but I need human voices around me!! And ultra, mega-multitudinal f uck!! I must have lost my handy bag, or maybe I never even brought it out in the first place. Now I'd have to borrow stuff from that goody-two-shoes and that would be the end of the world for me.

"Hey, Kikibe!" I shout out, kicking some bushes lying in the way. "Hey, we oughta stop, it's getting dark!!"

He continues walking on. Annoyed and perfectly pissed at why I had to end up in this situation with the enemy, I pick up a pebble from the ground and fling it forward. It misses his head and lands on the top of his backpack.

He stops, turns around, picks up the pebble in some kind of slow motion and glares at me.

I shrug. "Hey, I'm just reminding." I flash my most innocent smile. Smiiiiile.

"I know." He snaps. "But we ought to get to dryer ground, or would you rather make slumber with Thai creepie-crawlies?"

"Owh." Shivering at his choice of words, I jog up so that I can walk alongside him. "That's consideration, ain't it? Bastard?"

"Whatever. And please keep at least 5 inches between us. I tend to get a lil nauseous at your freaking body stench." He glares at me.

"For sure." I shrug, not affected at the least.

We finally come to a halt at what seemed like a clearing. I look at the Swatch digital on my left wrist and coo loudly. "2100 hours!! Whoohoo!!"

"Shut up, we don't want unwanted attention from something carnivorous." Kikibe sets his backpack on a mossy rock and grabs a torchlight out. He stuffs it between the clench of his upper and lower teeth while I watch in amusement and annoyance.

"Oh hey! What's that for, Halloween?"

"Noooo, it's for Christmas!" Kikibe smiles a sinister smile, trying to act sarcastic.

"Lameness is you." I shake my head.

I watch as he lies down and close his eyes, and then I heave an extra, uberly huge sigh.

Chickadees!!!!! This is going to be the longest day ever.


Esquirella Haha, thanks. Motivation boost :D

Mmagalina Hiiiiii :D Haha, Todd's kinda cute. And thanks. Really. Glad to know someone actually reads it and likes it xD