A/N: Collaboration between myself and three others. We didn't really liked where it was going so we stopped writing it. This was the second collaboration we did. The way we wrote it is one person wrote about one hundred or so words, then email it to the next person who'd write about one hundred words and so on. We are working on another way better collaboration at the moment. Read, if you'd like.



Dreamland is an alternate universe. Naturally, one is transferred there when he or she goes to sleep. Therefore, all events that take place in a dream are actually occurring in another world. So, what if not only the dreamer's spirit was transported, but their physical being as well? Dreamland and everything in it would certainly be knocked out of balance. The following is a tale of once such incident, involving four teenage girls and their insane, uncontrollable imagination.

(Writer 1's Note: 'Tis a prologue! It's not really a beginning, but it's what you guys get for making me write this when I have no good ideas. No hard feelings, though :D)


Once upon a time there were four girls. Their names, you ask? You don't get to know yet. Why, you ask? Because we here at BizarreStoryWriting, Inc. need to hide some things from you, don't we? Perhaps the entire conflict and plot of the story was given away to you in the prologue, and we don't want you to know everything yet! Or perhaps you don't know what's going on right now... or do you? The very essence of a story is at stake! For the time being, we strongly recommend that the real story be started in a timely manner. Chop, chop!

Well, we should be starting for real soon. But first, a glass of tea is needed.

Okay, one of the young girls was supposed to be studying for her insanely huge geography test (hint hint) when she fell asleep at her computer. In her dream, she fell into a meadow filled with Venus fly-traps and daisies. At once, the fly-traps started hissing and snapping. The girl kept swatting at them but they would keep opening and biting. She was about to go into a hysterical fit, when a knight in shining armor appeared before her. Well, he would have been, but he wasn't in any armor and he didn't appear to have been knighted. He took her hand and led her out of the field and into the forest where she thought she saw Bambi, but realized that it was his mother when the deer got shot. Bewildered, she began to ask, "Where the hell am I?!" but she was interrupted by someone else's voice. She didn't know why, but the voice seemed eerily familiar.

"Erin?" the voice said. "Erin? Erin! Hello, it's me, Katherine! What are you doing here. I was just hunting and I shot this huge doe, when I heard some ruffling around in the leaves over here. I was about to shoot you before I realized I knew you," the person who claimed she was Erin's friend Katherine said.

Erin turned in disbelief. The only words that she could manage were, "Where did that hawt guy go?"

"What hot guy?...you mean Lauren?" Katherine muttered, confused. Then her face split into a grin, "Silly Erin, this is Dreamland! And by Dreamland, I mean your Dreamland, which is practically Anime/StarWars/RedScaryBiteyThings Land!" Katherine slapped a friendly hand to Erin's back, "Aha! You know in anime you can never tell guys from gals!"

Just then Lauren burst through the forest on the back of an extraordinarily large hare with extraordinarily spectacular feet and large, expressive eyes. Lauren slid off the saddle which was strapped to the beasts back and dashed towards the fallen doe. Weeping and kneeling at the sad animal's side, she ripped off her own, manliesque face as if it were a mask to reveal the TRUE Lauren face!

"Thumper! I'm so sorry!" she cried, turning back towards the large rabbit, both of them wearing expressions of horror and disbelief, "You can't be with your mother anymore!"

"…The crap?"

"Lauren!! What the hell are you doing?!" yelled Erin. "YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE A HOT GUY!!!"

"What—oh! Yeah. That was just a disguise to sneak past the Evil Badger King, Walid."

"And… how would dressing up as a man help you do so?" asked Katherine.

"Actually, that was an invisible suit, meaning that if I wear it I become invisible!!"

"Then why could we see you?"

"Because it broke."


Suddenly, the ground beneath the three girls, doe corpse, and rabbit, split open to reveal a fiery pit of doom! And then, out from the fiery pit of doom, leapt Monica and her undead penguin army!

"MUAHAHAHAHAH!!!" maniacal laughter filled the air as Monica made her entrance.

"Uh… Monica? Are you feeling well?" Katherine politely asked.

"MUAHAHA---eh… yeah. I've just always wanted to do that. And look! I've got an army of cute and cuddly undead penguins! Aren't they ADORABLE?!"

"Yes…," said Erin, poking one of the zombie penguins with a stick.

"Anywhoooo… I've got important news! Evil Badger King Walid, Evil Monkey Advisor Mitch, Evil Fairy Princess Zach, and Evil Blue Sorcerer Chris are plotting to take over the world!!!"

Katherine, knowing that all of this was a dream, broke out into a slow yet amused laugh. Rather unexpectedly, giant cups filled with sunflower seeds and topped off with fitting blue lids fell from the sky! A bluish-teal miasma filled the sky as the Evil Blue Sorcerer Chris floated down on his magic flying blue shirt.

"Oh no!" Yelled the three girls in unison. Suddenly, an ungodly sucking noise filled the air.

"AAAH! What is that?" Yelled Katherine.

"It's the Evil Blue Sorcerer Chris sucking in all his spit from his maniacal laughter!" The girls started to run away, but Monica soon realized that she had left her poor, helpless, undead penguin army! She ran back to discover that they had all turned into bean sprouts. Good old yummy bean sprouts.

"Ooh, bean sprouts!" Erin exclaimed stating the obvious.

"What exactly do bean sprouts taste like?" pondered Lauren, scooping up a handful and starting to eat. "Mmmm… nummy nummy."

Zach looked disapproving. "I don't think Monica likes it that you're eating her penguin army," said he.

Lauren looked over to see Monica curled up in the fetal position crying, "Penguins, oh little penguins. You'll be in a happy place soon. Once you get past Lauren's large intestine you'll be home free."

Katherine cringed at the image that Monica's statement had implied, and Lauren stopped eating promptly.

Then, a loud noise distracted the group from Lauren's digestive functions.

"Whoa, boy. SKEZIX! Slow down, polymeric lecherous filiation-ous crapulous genocidal editorial lipoid of youth!" hollered the Evil Monkey Advisor, Mitch as he pulled on the reigns of his sled pulled by a very small calf. Mitch jumped off the sleigh and tossed his scarf made of machine gun rounds behind him.

"Your infamous reign of super-blatted ignited embryonic Herodotus-esque terror has come to an end, you fornicated polities-full, necroticly blastardous phonetic ruffian! You have no chance to survive make you time!" he cried.

Wielding a long stick with a pleasant looking garden snake hanging precariously at the tip, Mitch appeared to charge at Erin, (she shrieked, cursed, and then jumped out of the way with a few more 'crapshitwtf?'s) then quickly changed course and smashed headlong into a nearby boulder, which immediately shattered, revealing the freakishly large homework monster!!!! Composed of crumpled homework paper, the monstrosity speedily crawled and wriggled to Lauren. Lauren, her back turned to the monster, was trying to add on to the story when the monster enveloped her in a papery doom.

It is here we here at BizarreStoryWriting, inc. leave you for a brief moment to explain some things. First of all, we are aware, as you well should be, that there is little to no plot to this story as of yet. So we bring you to a magical land some seventy miles away and in another dimension that will not add any significant value to this story, but instead serve as a brief aside to the complete irrelevancy of the previous events of this story, if you will. Thank you, and we encourage you to continue reading. Mind you, we're not sure what's going on either.

Meanwhile, in the faraway land of Relevancy, everything was going pretty much on schedule. The people were walking around, talking, buying things... when suddenly, a whirlpool-shaped vortex appeared in the sky and eight teenagers flew through the air and landed in the middle of pie. Pecan pie to be exact.

"It's the answer to my non-existent prayers!" cried Erin as she began to shove her face with the baked good.

The Evil Badger King Walid looked amidst the pie. "This certainly pulls us back on our plot to dominate the world," he said to his fellow conquerors.

"That's okay Evil Badger King Walid. We can take over the pecan pie instead," the Evil Blue Sorcerer Chris said optimistically.

"Oooo! Can I help!" Lauren asked eagerly, brushing the ink from the homework monster's mouth off of her shirt.

"No," three of the four conquerors said in unison. "No girls allowed."

Lauren's eyes filled with tears of rejection and the Evil Fairy Princess Zach patted her on the back. "Don't worry Lauren. You and the other girls can dominate the pie if you want to," he said rather in a rather maternal tone.


A/N: And that's where we decided this story was crap. Did you like it? Did you hate it? Critique is welcomed though flames are not. Press that whitish button, fools!