A/N: Just random things, most of which are funny or just plain stupid. Please no rude comment. Enjoy.
1
Lanie: Can girls get testicular cancer?
Miss Buckner: ...Girls...don't have those.
2
Me: (hears party boy music) Who's listening to Party Boy?
Zack: Me.
Mrs. Batallas: Zack, are you Party Boy?
Zack: Oh yeah.
Me: DO YOU KNOW WHAT PARTY BOY IS???
Mrs. Batallas: No what is it?
Me: A dude dancing while stripping down to a silver speed-o!!!
Mrs. Batallas: Zack, turn that off, I see enough of that at home.
Class: (stares)
3
Ashley: Testies?
Everyone: (silence)
Me: Poseidon?
Everyone: (silence)
Erik: Testicular cancer?
Everyone: (laughs)
4
Brian: What's a "K" word for the lunch ladies?
Jez: Kinky.
Brian: (puts that down)
Brian: Hey Ms. Batallas? What does kinky mean?
5
Krystal: looking in history book I want to own a black person.
Me: There's Gabe.
Krystal: (looks at Gabe) Can I have you?
Gabe: (having missed our conversation) WHAT?
6
Me: When the guys ask what the girls did in gym, we didn't learn yoga, we learned sex positions. Got it?
7
Sam: Do girl plants and boy plants get married and have little seeds?
(Sad part, he was serious.)
8
(My teacher has an 'easy button'...you know, the thing that says 'that was easy'")
Guy #1: (presses button)
Guy #2: (presses button)
Guy #3: (presses button)
Preppy Pain: I get it! I'm easy!
Whole class: (stares)
9
Stacy: I want a nose job.
Brianna: I want a hand job, my knuckles are huge.
10
Brianna: I got peed on by a goat.
Dana: You liked it. You probaly go down the road looking for a goat in high heels, and say "I'll give you $500 to pee on me."
11
Brianna: What would you do if I got hit by a parked car?
Me: Laugh.
12
Me: Mom, what would you do if you saw someone get hit by a parked car?
Mom: I dunno, go help them?
Dad: (staring blankly) Think about it.
Mom: ...Go help them?
13
Dad: (staring at cell phone, a sign that he's having trouble with a text message)
Me: What word can't you spell?
Dad: I'm not gonna ask you how to spell it.
Me: Why not?
Dad: You're gonna laugh at me.
Me: Why would I laugh?
Dad: 'Cause it only has three letters.
Me: (bursts out laughing)
14
Me: Erik, where's your girlfriend?
Erik: Right next to me.
Me: (turns to girl next to him) YOU DO EXIST!!!!
15
Vanessa: Do I look naked?
Me, Brianna: What the hell?
16
Mrs. Kennedy: Don't ask me what to do or I'm gonna scream.
Casey L: What do we do?
Classes surrounding Mrs. Kennedy's: (hears scream)
17
Me: I hate 7th Heaven, old people make out too much.
18
Me: If you're a scientist and religous aren't you a hypocrite?
Mr. Dufour: Or you could throw both out the window a be a scientologist.
19
Mrs. McLaughlin: Violence in never the answer.
Me: You're teaching us about the Revolutionary War!!
20
Mrs. Balchunuis: Ryan, give me your laser pointer pen.
Ryan: I don't have it.
Mrs. Balchunuis: Then what's that between your legs?
Me, Ashley: WHAT?!?!?!
21
Erin: I had stomach cramps for almost a week. I go to the E.R. and you know what the doctor says? I was 'full of poo.'
22
Mr. Dufour: The Dead Sea is warm.
Nikky: Did someone pee in it?
23
Me: You can't come to camp with me, you dont have a severe skin condition.
Brianna: I have severe ugliness.
Me: ...Okay you can come.
24
Some kid: I'm just talking to myself...and the little leprachans...
25
Erin: What's the Mile High Club? Do I need to learn from experience?
26
Person: (Cough)
Mrs. Chase: STOP TALKING!!!
27
(Listening to The Outsiders on tape.)
Tape: You better not rub Dally the wrong way.
Erin: You better rub me the wrong way 'cause I'm a genie in a bottle!
28
Mr. Dufour: If you believe everything you see in movie, you have a problem.
Me: (immediatly turns to Erin)
Erin: I was waiting for that.
29
Erin: Isn't #1-29 thirty problems? I'm gonna count them.
Me: That'll be easy, considering they're ALREADY NUMBERED!!!
30
Brianna: There was a fucking spider on my fucking bed! What the fuck did you expect me to do?
Erik: Fuck it.