.:. Love a Phobic .:.
Hell in the forms of Pills & Amusement Parks


Here's my perspective of love and relationships -- it sucks. I hate it and I always will. I also definitely hate that I'm at an amusement park, sitting with my sister and her boyfriend…at the top of a Ferris wheel.

So…imagine this. It's night, amusement park in California, songs from various movies wailing in the background. Lots and lots of kids. Where am I? …I'm at Disneyland. California Adventures. Wasn't this supposed to be the most happiest place on Earth? I glance at my watch and it's around midnight.

I give my sister a silent glare (which was ignored) as she and her boyfriend whisper to each other. She hits him on the arm, pouting, acting like a child who wants candy.

She used to be so strong…my role model at one point of my life. Realistic and responsible, she helped my parents in any way possible. I looked up to her a lot. She once didn't care about what others thought of her, she was confident and believed in herself.

That image shattered when she met Benjamin Keseloff.

He wasn't exactly popular, he wasn't a druggie, he was just…there. Mr. Average, as I call him. He turned my sister into a lovesick, giddy, immature girl. I will never understand how these changes took place, but it happened.

And she isn't the first person I know who this has happened to. My once closest friend, Joan, hooked up with Timothy Clark toward the end of sophomore year. Before they got together, we used to hang out every day, and talk for endless of hours. We couldn't stop talking. Now? Our conversations last five minutes, max. When I see her in the hallways, we would exchange greetings and that would be that.

As the Ferris wheel came to a stop, the two lovebirds did not notice. I tapped my foot impatiently and drummed my fingers on my thigh. Our wagon…thing…came to another stop and I jumped up to the door. I wanted to get far away from them. I needed to.

It's summer break and when I could be at home, sitting on my couch, reading a nice book, I'm here. To "supervise" my sister (who I did mention was older, right?) on her stupid date with Mr. Average was hard work. I can't believe mom's making me do this.

I feel like there's a Mr. Smith out there who's converting all the girls into this love-crazy state and I'm "Mr. Anderson", trying to figure out what to do to save everyone and was on the verge of failing. At this point, I wish I took the blue pill. But of course, everyone knows how that ends right? The same Mr. Anderson somehow won. The Prophecy and etcetera. So taking the red pill wasn't exactly a huge mistake. If Neo could do it, then so could I...somehow.

Some people say that I'm love-a-phobic, or in scientific terms, I'm "philophobic." Is that even real? Oh well. In other words, I'm afraid of falling in love or being loved.

Of course, that's not true. There's a huge difference between being afraid of love and to absolutely hate it. I have good reason to hate love, those people just don't understand what it's done to my life. And no, I'm not in denial.

I'll just take the time to do this now.

I vow to never get a boyfriend.

I, Daelyn Summers, vow to never fall in love.

And I will keep up to this vow! No matter what anyone will say. Now I just need to get this on paper when I get back home from this personal hell and take some tylenol for my headache. A red pill.

Where the hell is the exit?

o-----------------------o--------------------o

At the moment Karen parks the car, I hop out and rush to the door. I needed to get that red pill, badly. I didn't bother to turn on the lights all the way as I walked in.

"Where the hell's the Tylenol?" I mutter to myself. The lights in the kitchen grew stronger as my sister walks in.

She sighs, dare I say, dreamilly, as she puts her bag down. "Dae...today was so awesome, huh?"

I was in the middle of searching through the medicine cabinet, and didn't turn around to face her.

"...Riiight." I drawled. I silently cheered as I found the blasted container and side-jumped to where the cups were at. I filled one with water and gulped the two pills down. I walked over to sit across the table. Karen was in a dazed state.

I rolled my eyes at her. "Are you done day-dreaming about him?"

"Mmhmm." She sighed contently again.

"Uh..huh..." I stood up. "G'night."

I walked up the stairs to my room, leaving my sister. I closed the door and hopped on my bed.

Stupid boyfriends.

Stupid love.


A/N: Welcome to Love a Phobic! I was in need of a title and I couldn't really...think of anything. But oh well. This was the prologue, so, it was short. More of the characters will be described in the next chapter (: It sort of got some basic information out. For example: her name, her sister's name, her sister's boyfriend's name, her once best friend's name, her once best friend's boyfriend's name, and where they lived.