and it's only a problem
when you're lonely
It doesn't matter if I sit here
It only makes me an attention whore
You laugh at me when I try
talk and disbelieve my scars.
But when you've got
something to say
you say loud and don't care whether I can deal,
like the time I almost was arrested, you tell me
It was "The most fun you've had in years! We should do it again!"
and that you where going to swallow a bottle
full of sleeping pills right before I called.
You don't care that
I've had other friends
attempt the same
It makes me
wonder why I consider you my BFF
and then I think about all the fun we've had
and how it all depended on
whether you where ready,
or you felt like it,
or my mom driving us everywhere.
You never did any of work,
and when ever I tried to walk away
to deny me the right and pull yourself
asked you for a favor,
just draw me ten black and white pictures
two weeks before spring break.
And I'm still waiting for you to get past six pictures.
Is this all my fault? Am I
over reacting by missing
my best friend?
First my best friend since 7th grade decides she hates me
and now you.
Do you hate me too?
I really want keep our friendship together
but I'm tired of being the only one whose trying
Don't you care anymore? Or am I just delusional?
It's been three days and the most you've said to me is
a quick Hey in passing.
And through it all
I still want to be your friend
But I guess it doesn't matter
because you aren't listening away.