Addy in Vain
Pranks and Ice Cream
Hey. My name is Adair, or Addy if you prefer. Though you already knew that didn't you? People tend to remember me, because in all honesty, I'm hard to forget. I'm slim and fairly tall, about 5'8" with long golden brown hair and startling blue eyes. My nose is a hell of a lot straighter than most and I have full lips that any guy would dream of kissing.
I'm sure you've all been able to tell by now that I'm fairly cocky and vain. How is that a fault really? Isn't it more a realization of your assets? I'm so sick of all these gorgeous females 'not understanding' the beauty they possess just so they can plead modesty. I mean, please. It's so obviously just a ploy so that they can be told over and over again how pretty they are. At least I'm not like that.
Don't misunderstand me though. It's not like I go around and stare in to every mirror I see like Tinkerbell does (the overrated twit). Seriously. Somebody should cut off her hair then shove some pixie dust up her ass. That of course, it completely besides the point.
What I'm trying to get across here is that I'm not completely vain. I know I have my faults—for example if you asked me to draw you a butterfly you'd end up with a stick man that looks like a horse. Really I'm just okay with who I am. I know I'm good looking and as far as I'm concerned it's not a bad thing. If you think otherwise, then go play with yourself in a corner, because I couldn't care less.
An annoying child suddenly barged in to my room, interrupting this narration of my life.
"Addy! What the fuck is wrong with you?!?" my brother stated.
I looked over apathetically to my older sibling. I suppose "child" wasn't exactly the correct term to use. He was a year older than me, and shared many of my physical features. Minus the boobs of course. He looked pretty angry at the moment, though I wasn't too concerned.
"What did I do now?" I asked him disinterestedly.
"You put water snakes in my fish bowl!" he exclaimed.
Ah. Now he had my attention. "Did he eat them?" I inquired excitedly.
"NO!" my darling brother roared. "I got the stupid thing out before it could do any damage."
"Damage? Christ Pat, they're just silly fish," I told him, losing interest in the conversation.
"Silly fish?!?!" he shrieked, the pimple on his chin looking as though it was about to eat me.
"You know Pat, usually your sister sounds like she's on crack, though this time I have to agree with her," Seamus told him as he entered my room as well.
"Oh thank you Seamus, I'm ever so glad I have your approval. I've waited so long for this moment, oh my!" I blurted sarcastically, pretending to swoon.
"Addy, my love, you should have said something earlier!" Seamus replied, running to catch me as I fell. He missed, so I ended up falling anyways.
I glared at my brother's best friend from where I lay on the floor. He'd gotten new glasses, I noticed. I still didn't like them. That kid had the most amazing green eyes you'd ever see but he always hid them behind big clunky glasses. Other than that he was okay, I mean, he wasn't overly gorgeous but definitely above the average. More of a nerdy-cute than anything I'd say.
Seamus only laughed at my glare. "Well, I suppose this brings 'falling for me' to a whole new level, eh Addy?"
I lunged and smacked his shin. He let out a little howl of pain, which led to my extreme satisfaction. That is, until I tried to get up and he shoved me down again.
"You're going down bi-atch!" I yelled.
Seamus and I started to wrestle mercilessly. Unfortunately, he was winning. He eventually pinned me down with his shoulder and grabbed my leg (which was about to kick him where the sun don't shine).
"Guys! You're both missing the point here! MY FISH!" I heard my brother inform us once more. Seamus and I both looked at him before we cracked up laughing. I managed to hear my brother sigh in defeat and flop down beside us on the floor. I stuck my tongue out at him. He returned the gesture much less kindly.
Once our laughter had died down, we just lay on my floor in silence. Summer was nearly over and we were all sadly excited to get back to school. There were some friends I hadn't seen in a while, and Pat's girlfriend was only going to be coming back a few days before school. Yeah, the loser actually had a girlfriend. It's not that he isn't good looking enough to have one, because like I said, he looks like me, it's just his personality that's his downfall. Complete nerd. I'm not even joking. His ultimate goal in high school is to be appointed Dungeon Master in his Dungeons and Dragons club. Then again, I probably shouldn't talk, being a part of that club myself. I just don't want to be Dungeon Master; it really is the most boring person to be in the game.
Anyway, my brother and I pretty much hung out in the same crowd. We didn't really hang out all the time but we had a lot of our friends in common. Seamus and I were cool with each other; we'd known each other since before elementary school at least. My best friend Peter didn't quite get along with Seamus and Pat though.
Peter was pretty much your typically high school jock. He was gorgeous as hell, blonde hair and innocent hazel eyes, tall and muscular, key player on the rugby team. Oh yeah, he was smokin'. He'd had more girlfriends than I could count and more one night stands than I had fingers and toes. He's a real player—which is one of the reasons Seamus and Pat don't like him—but that's just the way he is as far as I'm concerned. I don't approve of the way he treats girls all the time, but as long as he doesn't hit on me, I don't really care all that much. He's always been like that and it's not my job to tell him what to do or to try and change him. That's what his future wife is supposed to do.
Another one of my close friends would be Eileen. She's pretty cool. Did I mention she's my brother's girlfriend? Yeah, the one that's not coming back for another few days. That would be her. It's disgusting how lovey-dovey they are. You all have permission to smack me if I ever get that sickening. So yeah, one of my best friends is probably going to marry my brother. Joy of joys. It kind of bothered me at first, but then I saw how happy they are together (despite the disgusting level of love) and it didn't bother me so much. Plus, Eileen would be an awesome sister in law.
"So what are we doing today?" Seamus asked lazily.
"Mm. I have plans with Peter later," I informed the two.
"Eurgh. That guy is so disgusting Addy, I don't get how you can date him," my brother told me.
"EW! I assure you Patrick, I am NOT, I repeat, NOT dating Peter. That is the grossest thing you've ever said. Ever," I emphasized, thoroughly grossed out.
"You guys act like you're dating," Seamus added.
"Friends do that sometimes. Did you forget that we recently proclaimed our love for each other, Seamus?" I reminded him. He merely shrugged in response. I rolled my eyes.
"Well, I'm going to go take a shower and get ready. You two bums better not still be on my floor when I come out."
At that I got up and made my way to the bathroom attached to my bedroom. A nice long shower felt like a good idea on this hot August morning.
I got out of the shower and towel dried my hair. After I'd dried the rest of myself off I wrapped the towel around myself and stepped back in to my room. Luckily the two boys weren't there anymore. I put on some music, as I got out my hair dryer. Once that was done I started to straighten it, singing along to the music.
"I wanna wake up where you are,
I won't say anything at all,
So why don't you slide?
I'll do anything you ever dream to be complete…"
"Well Addy, I never knew you felt that way!" I heard somebody say from behind me. I squealed and jumped before turning around.
"Peter! Christ you nearly scared the shit out of me!" I yelled at my friend. He only laughed.
"I must say Addy, I like this much better than your usual attire."
I looked down, and then remembered that I was still only in my towel. I glared at him before throwing a pillow. "Get out of my room you perverted jackass!" I shrieked. He laughed some more, but complied with my wishes.
I quickly got dressed and finished my hair before proceeding down the stairs to where Peter was most probably waiting for me. I was met with a very strange site indeed.
My three boys were all playing video games together. My mouth fell open in shock. They didn't hate each other per se, though there was definitely a mutual dislike among them. To find them playing games together like old friends was only a little strange.
"Uhmm…did you guys drop some acid or something?" I asked tentatively.
"Not recently," I heard Seamus reply distractedly while he only glanced fleetingly my way.
Then the television suddenly blared out "FATALITY" which caused Peter to jump up in victory. "Score! I kicked your asses!"
"Real mature, Pete," I assured my friend sarcastically.
"Why thank you Adair. Ready to go?"
"Yeah," I told him, and then giggled at my brother who was currently giving Pete the finger behind his back.
"Let's go then," my friend said. "Nice playing with you guys."
Seamus waved and smiled, though Pat just nodded unenthusiastically. I stuck my tongue out at them both before waving goodbye and leaving the house.
"So where are we off to today Pete?" I wondered aloud.
He cackled mischievously. "Off to cause some major mayhem I think."
"Sounds like a plan," I replied, grinning evilly as well. Pete and I were infamous for our pranks, which ranged from putting water snakes in my brother's fish bowl to pouring un-whipped whipped cream down the head cheerleader's cleavage. We hadn't caused trouble in a while though, so we were both way overdue for our dosage of fun.
It was bound to be an amusing day.
I crouched behind the door as Peter slowly moved his sister's hand so that it was sitting in the lukewarm water. His sister was in college now, though she still lived at home. It was all I could do to stifle my giggles. Peter flashed me a winning smile before we made our way in to his basement.
"How about a movie?" he asked me.
"Sounds good," I replied. "Let's watch Wayne's World!"
He rolled his eyes, knowing it was one of my favorite movies. We watch it nearly every time we hang out. Either that or Peter Pan. He took out Wayne's World and put it in the player, then came to sit on the couch beside me.
We cuddled up platonically and started watching the movie. We were about half when through when we heard a shriek from upstairs.
Pete and I looked at each other, before smiling evilly. We paused the movie and slowly got up, and made our way upstairs. When we got to his sister's bedroom, the door was still slightly ajar from when we had left earlier.
"Something wrong sister dearest?" Peter asked, somewhat mockingly.
His sister, Michelle, turned around quickly. "No! No, I'm fine, just—just leave! GET OUT!" she started yelling.
Peter and I left before she could come chase us out with a fly swatter. We returned to the basement where we both cracked up with laughter.
"Who ever heard of a twenty year old wetting their bed?" he asked between bouts of laughter. I was laughing to hard to reply.
Once we'd calmed down, I asked, "Want to go out for ice cream?"
Peter looked at me speculatively. "Are you paying?"
"No, you are."
He sighed. "Fine, but only because I'm such a great guy."
"Yeah, right," I scoffed, laughing at him.
He pretended to look offended as we left the house. He managed it for about two minutes before he let a giggle slip out. We got in his car and drove to the ice cream parlor. There was a line because the day was so nice, but we weren't deterred. Ice cream was enough to hold us there. We made random small talk as the line advanced.
"Hey Addy," I heard somebody say as they came up beside me. I looked over and saw it was Seamus.
I smiled at him. "Hey Seamus, Pat's not with you?"
"Nah, I was on the way home when I got a craving," he told me, jerking a thumb towards the ice cream booth.
I nodded in understanding. "I see. What flavor?"
"Neapolitan," he told me, his eyes smiling.
"I though so," he replied. I was about to say something when I heard Pete clear his throat.
Seamus and I turned to look at him with raised eyebrows.
"Sorry, just had something in my throat," he explained unconvincingly. I rolled my eyes once more and took a few steps forwards as the line moved.
"So how much trouble have you two gotten in to today?" Seamus asked us.
Peter and I both started laughing again, which was inconvenient as it was our turn to order. I managed to order my twist soft iced cream in a sugar cone without completely freaking the girl behind the counter out, Pete however wasn't so lucky. The fact that he was ordering the kiddy bubble gum ice cream didn't help matters much either. Seamus just shook his head knowingly.
Once we'd all gotten our ice creams we went and sat on a bench.
"So what exactly did you guys do then?" Seamus asked curiously.
"We made Michelle wet her bed," I said snorting.
Seamus choked on his ice cream before eventually swallowing. He laughed out loud. He had a really nice laugh, I decided. It was clear and… sparkly. I know that didn't make sense but they're my thoughts, so they don't have to.
"How did you manage to do that?" he gasped out.
"The whole warm water trick," Peter explained, his mouth curled up in a grin as well.
"That's priceless," Seamus said, still very amused.
"Why thank you, love," I told him, slinging an arm around his shoulder.
"Anything for you," he told me, pretending to lean in for a kiss.
I smacked his face away and started laughing at his fake look of dejection.
I turned to Pete. "Come on, fatty, time to drive me home. It's been a long day."
"Watch who you're calling fat, Addy. I'll have you know I work out a hell of a lot more often than you do!"
"That's because I don't aspire to be the next Ms. Universe," I told him pointedly.
He scoffed as he got up. He then pulled me to my feet, but not before Seamus snuck an arm around my waist and pulled me back.
"Oomph," was my amazing articulation.
"I'll take her home," Seamus offered. "I live closer anyway."
Pete looked a little unsure for a second, then shrugged. "Whatever, fine by me."
I put on my best puppy dog face and looked up at him. "Petey, you're supposed to fight for me!"
He shook his head and laughed. "I'll talk to you later, Addy." I smiled and said my goodbye as well.
I leaned back against Seamus, only then noticing he still hadn't let go of my waist. I didn't really mind, it felt kind of nice actually. Comforting. He was still eating his ice cream and evidently hadn't noticed he was still holding me either. I absently started playing with the hairs on his arm.
"What are you doing?" he asked, his mouth close to my ear.
I looked up at him, fighting the shivering sensations running down my back. "I don't know," I said, smiling.
He shook his head at me. "So, I guess I'd better get you home now."
I nodded. I was tired. Seamus took his arm back, I—unconcious of Seamus' eyes on me—stretched in a cat-like fashion before getting up.
It only took about five minutes for Seamus to get me home. I gave him a small kiss on the cheek good night then climbed out of his car. When I got to my room I collapsed on my bed and fell asleep instantly.
AN: So…. new story. Tell me what you think. I really like Addy myself. I'd like to say now that it's Addy-Seamus. Peter is only a friend who's just a major flirt. I would like to state now that Pat is not extremely overly protective. Nor are he and Seamus completely gorgeous and popular. Addy is more popular than they are. So HA! Take that cliché! Actually this is still kind of a cliché, but whatever. It amuses me.
Disclaimer:I do not own Tinkerbell, Dungeons and Dragons, Slide by the Goo Goo Dolls, Wayne's World, Peter Pan or Ms. Universe, though it's unfortunate that I don't, because if I did I'd be rich.
So you read, now REVIEW.