Some people wonder what love is. Dina wondered everyday. She wondered what made it so great, and she knew that it wasn't just the boyfriend of the week, or hearts on the margins of notebook paper. High school and love had nothing to do with each other in most senses. But then again there were only those two things about Dina, what she did know- and what she didn't. She was just like everyone else.
She fell in love one summer. She knew this boy was different, more extraordinary. He called her different in the way she pronounced her words, and wore her hair. He called the way she expressed emotions different, but he loved her smile that lit of the room. She never believed him, only believed in his talents… because who could really believe that someone who was that perfect could be real…
For years she sat and pondered love. Her friends knew when she would think about the boy, and they say to her, "Levi," she was never sure where the nickname came from, "Levi, you've got to stop this." And she would tell them that he was not just a fling, she would bite harshly at them with some other comment, and walk away briskly.
They would never understand her, or what they had because they had never felt it. At their current rate, she was afraid they never would. She pondered love some more after this thought left her. The irony of it is when one is in love their mere warmth and presence makes you feel as small and playful as a kitten, and makes them look ten feet tall. But it is the same for them. When they see you, long chocolate hair, big chocolate eyes, and ruby lips you seem ten feet tall to them. They feel like the kitten to you. But that's the way it works, love unbalances things but at the same time balances them with its unbalanced-ness. Which doesn't really make sense, but then again that's love.
Her friends are back, ruining her thoughts. They say to her, "Levi," that stupid name again… she is not a pair of jeans, "come out with us tonight. You could meet someone you know."
"I don't want to meet anyone. I have already met him, and I prefer not to have to spend the next sixteen years finding someone just like him again. Thank you, but no."
"I am happy and because you can't handle that you want me to go out, and try to impress someone I don't know merely on looks? You want me to do my hair and put on make-up to impress some stranger? Well here's what I want, which right now seems more important to me. I want to go back to where I didn't need to see my friends everyday to be happy. I want to go back to where nothing else mattered and I could be in antiques store and not be bored. I want to go back to love, the sunshine, the warmth, the smiles, and the fire in his hair. I want it all back."
"Levi," stop calling me that, I reprimand her but she continues, "You have to stop dwelling on this guy. I mean, it's been four years, you…" I interrupt her.
"Four years, three-hundred-thirty-one days." I mutter quietly but crisply.
"Whatever, get over it. Come to the movies with us."
"Do you know how dirty it is there?"
"Levi," she starts, and I correct her, "Dina, please, we'll go to the outdoor if you want."
"Open spaces," she cuts me off.
"You just don't want to see Cameron do you? Listen, I know you pushed him away for this other guy, but he loves you. I can see it in the way you talk to him and the way he cares about you. He worries about you. I know you could love him too, if you could just let this other guy go. In fact, I know you love him, the way you talk about him, and look at him. The way you can't stand not being able to look into his eyes."
"Listen," I say softly, "I understand where you're coming from, but when you fall in love you'll thank me for not doing this to you."
"Telling you to move on."
The oldies station playing in the back ground seemed more amplified to my ears as I recalled this boy who remind me of the old days, and I was warned by the old time singer,
Only fools rush in.