Been messin a bit with this, toying it around. not sure i said what i wanted to, but i'll work on it. you'll see.


Look. Beauty.

There's this thing about Photoshop and manipulating portraits. When you've been working with it for a while, you start to see things. I don't mean those midnight, I've-got-a-headache-coming-on-and-it's-been-way-too-long-since-I've-seen-sky kind of things. I mean little things.

You'll be walking down the hallway and see someone with shadows under their eyes and you feel a finger twitch for the dodge tool and the tiniest touch of blur, on 73 opacity, brush size 29.

An unfortunate mole has you matching skin tones and wondering how distinctive it is and whether you should just make it prettier or if you can get away with doing away with it all together.

Acne and freckles make you wish for real life Gaussian blur with a radius of 4.1 pixels and opacity of 62. Smooth skin is only a few clicks away; all you have to sacrifice is texture.

Your colleague's sloppy eyebrows could never survive two and a half minutes of liquefy and push. Brush size 18. The perfect arch and neat ends. Say goodbye to that unibrow mister.

Double chins and thin lips barely count as enemies; hooded eyes come close to formidable while you laugh at birthmarks.

You know you can make them beautiful. You see it in every face. A tweak, a push, one more click and you've made perfection.

They tell me that Photoshop ruins beauty, makes it too easy to be beautiful, takes the earning out of it, makes women strive to be what only software can make them.

They say that I'm a part of the frontline, the offensive against women and their self confidence, their sense of worth and attractiveness. I tell them that the media only plays on the ignorant and continue my ceaseless clicking. There is beauty in there and I'm going to find it, flush it out, and bring it to its heights. I will wrench it from mediocrity even if only for the few minutes before I hit alt F4 and shut down my system.

Because I watch from sleep deprived eyes, with a nose I know is uneven only because I've fixed it a million times and see beauty in every face that passes by. Instead of noticing problems, I find solutions and beauty emerges. What is underneath comes through and perfection is in the placement of a mole, the wrinkles in a brow, the bloodshot eye of your best friend. You start seeing things you don't like but wouldn't change. You learn to see people as they are even as you picture them as they could be. You see the wonder of normalcy even as you search for the faces which are impossible to manipulate; the good, the bad and the ugly. But there's always something else your mouse can do, the turn of a lips, the shadow on skin, to make it better. Not everyone can be perfect but you'll find that not everyone wants to.

They say that Photoshop ruins things, but you soon find that Photoshop has you noticing the little things, the things you couldn't recreate, that make a person unique, beautiful, spectacular.

(But you know you'll still stay up 'til three AM making supermodels of your friends and monsters of your enemies because it just too goddamn absorbing.)