EDAM

I should like to be an edam if it weren't for the consumption,

At breakfast, dinner, supper, tea, or perhaps at a light luncheon

But one thing that is sure in life is someone will come munching

Peel back my skin, and take huge bites

Do they think cheeses feel no frights

Life as an Edam would be rotten

Left to harden, neglected, forgotten.

To wish someone would set me free

As tiny rodents nibble me

Oh housekeeper cant you see!

I'm so much better than the bree!

I shouldn't like to be an Edam, in any circumstances,

It's quite a dreadful, lonely life of death defying chances.

But surely the worst part (and it really makes me shudder)

The terrifying start in life, squeezed out of an udder!