I had finally realized that I am beautiful,

I had finally loved myself for who I am,

But then you swept in and took away my self confidence,

Again.

--

I was able to think for myself,

I was able to stand on my own two feet,

And then you came and knocked me down,

Again.

--

I'm tired of feeling like you are always there looking over my shoulder,

I'm tired of your voice telling me about every single bad thing that's ever happened to you,

I'm sick of being sick of you.

I just want to feel beautiful again

And I want to love myself again,

But I feel like every time I'm around you,

Every time I talk to you,

You suck all the confidence out of me.

--

I'm not jealous of you,

You just make me feel like shit,

You make me feel like I have to lose weight to be a better person,

You make me feel like I don't do anything right,

You make me feel ugly.

--

Deep down I know that I am a beautiful and confident girl,

And I know that you don't deserve my tears,

But I still let you make me feel bad about myself,

That makes me hate myself even more.

--

8-21-07