For The One Who Gave Birth To Me
You didn't care when I was small,
Instead you drank and chased the men,
I couldn't live up to your hopes,
Could only let you down again.
Sometimes, when I'm in the house,
I feel like I should talk to you,
Tell you what's inside my head,
Explain what I am going through.
Instead I choose to go away,
Spend a few days with my man,
I want to tell you that I hurt,
But I have never felt I can.
He wonders why you've never met,
He wonders why you never ask
Who he is or what he does
Or anything about his past.
Waiting for you, just to call me,
Wondering what I've done wrong,
Eight days later, when I'm home,
You act as though I've never gone.
You see my scars and call me crazy,
Before you've tried to know my mind,
Is it that you just don't care?
Or are you scared of what you'll find?
Is it things that I have done?
Is it something I still do?
Can you see yourself in me?
Do you think I'm just like you?
I'll always be your only daughter,
One you wish you'd never had,
I hope that I am never like you,
I would sooner be like Dad.
When I have children, I will love them,
Even if they play with knives,
I will never let them question
My commitment to their lives.
Hear these words and learn your lesson,
This has gone on far too long,
Once I thought you were my mother,
Blood means nothing, I was wrong.