I think I lost the meaning

In the midst of the these courses

What happened to my will to fight?

Steady hearts were burning

Yet I can't lit this candle now

The days drag on like obtuse cigarettes

The puffs representing my life blowing away

What was I doing here any way?

I think I se the wrong course,

But of course I was young and learning

Still can't figure where I went wrong

I can feel my heart beating in my chest

Not an ounce of silver or metal has pierced my flesh

So why do I wish to lie in the grass

Just to stare at clouds?