You see, the thing about stories written in the first person is that they immediately give something away. Because this story is riddled with the pronouns 'I', 'me', 'myself', and so on, you my dear reader, already know a very valuable piece of information: I survived.
Actually, I could be a ghost. Can ghosts use pencils? Well, that's not the point (Pun alert!). While there may not be any ghosts in this story, I should hope zombies will suffice. Throw in a dash of awkward teenage romance, scathing punchlines, and an overabundance of geeky references and you've got, well...this.
I'll stop babbling. ONWARD!