Recaps of my life gone by… sweet remnants of my days starting in Eagan. The memories of the way my life changed dramatically. That is what this story is about. Your average girl winding up in a place she doesn't belong. And that same girl losing the one thing she cares for most, and it's not her life. No, there was someone more important than that. Compared to this person her life was almost meaningless.

Twisted lies, deadly secrets, and a pain no other should go through. My life takes a spiraling journey to hell, and the ride started the moment I spoke those first words to my new family. The words that confined me to this life. My fate had been chosen at that moment, and never would I be able to break free.

What's worse is that because of me his fate rested in my hands, and if I'd ever found the courage to, I would have to kill him myself. I'd known as soon as the orders were given I would have to murder the one I loved, for everyone's sake.

I was lost, trapped behind the prison of my eyes, locked in the barrier known as my skin, and no matter how much I wanted it, there was no exit.

Chapter 1:

My life started in Eagan, Minnesota when my mother remarried to a man named Allen. He was an alright guy; laid back, cool, and not mention he could cook the hell out of some food. The only problem though: he lived in Minnesota while I, with my mom, lived in Wisconsin, so of course I wasn't happy about my mom moving in with him. Though the part about moving to another state was the least of my problems, the other reason I didn't like it was the fact that I had to change schools, meet new friends, and Allen had two other kids. West was eldest and my senior by a year, he failed a grade, while the youngest was Abbie who was merely fifteen, which suddenly made me the middle child, and I knew I wouldn't like being a middle child.

"Ana, I know it's hard." My mother said, interrupting my thoughts. "But it's not like you haven't already met them." She looked over and smiled at me; her youth still showed but subtle signs pointed out that she was forty-three. Honestly, I was nothing like my mother. She was tall, auburn haired, and bright blue eyed, while I was short and a little curvier with dark brown hair and green eyes. Not to mention I was more tan than she could get, and I could grow hair by the time I leave high school, thanks to my dad. "Moving is difficult, but its for the better." She tried to be optimistic about it, but I was certainly not as upbeat.

"I don't see why they couldn't move to Wisconsin." I made sure to put some emphasis to show how I felt. My mother just kind of shook her head at me.

"Our apartment can't hold five people, Ana. Allen has a much larger house which can easily accommodate us all." I still wasn't moved by her response. For the past five months I had been hoping Mom would have them move here.

"Then why couldn't we have just bought a bigger apartment in Wisconsin? I know there was a few of them for sale." My mom tossed me a weird eye.

"Ana, be reasonable. Why have him help buy a new apartment when he already owns a house big enough?" She had me beat there, but it still didn't persuade me to believe that moving this far was for the better. If anything she could have found someone a little closer than Minnesota. I didn't have any hard feelings against Allen, well except that he lived so far away.

Mom slowly pulled into the driveway of Allen's house. It was big but nothing flashy, just a normal two story house but the difference was that it was wider than most. I kind of glared at the sight of it, and its occupants piling out when they realized we arrived. Allen was the first out, tall, brunette, with lines forming at the corners of his mouth, and then a boy came out not too long after. I knew that to be West. He had short messy brown hair like his father's but he was a little darker and even more muscular. The only one missing was Abbie.

"Ana," My mother quietly called before we got out the car. "Try and control your temper here. I don't want to have to go to court and pay medical bills because you happened to brake some kid's nose." I made sure to tell her 'I'd try' and I guess she could tell in my voice I wasn't guaranteeing anything. She just sighed and got out the car to run and hug Allen. I wasn't too far behind her, and I certainly wasn't so jubilant. In fact I was the one standing in the back with my arms crossed as I kept my distance. Maybe, just maybe, they'd forget I was even there.

Of course, I thought too soon.

"Hi Ana, its nice to see you again." His smile grew wider emphasizing those creases framing his mouth. I gave a slight smile, but it wasn't the same as his. Mine was more forced than being happy to see him, because I wasn't.

"Yeah, you too." I said, my voice gone to a low monotone octave. Allen paid no attention to my reaction. I tapped the barbell in my tongue against my teeth and looked at West, my new stepbrother. He almost seemed neutral about the situation as he stood behind and watched, much like I was doing. Then, for a second, he kind of glanced up at me, almost like he was studying, trying to figure something out, and then he quickly looked away, removing himself from his post.

"Dad, I think it's about time we helped them unload." West's lips had curved into a smile revealing his pearly whites. Without hesitating, Allen agreed and moved toward the car. I really felt sorry for who ever grabbed my bag, because I could barely carry it, and I was pretty strong.

Later that night we ate dinner, and let me tell you, it was horrible. No, the food was great just being there made it horrible. They acted like it was twenty questions or something as they piled me down with them, asking me everything form my favorite color to whether I have a license or not. The only good thing about it was that I opened up a little seeing as they weren't bad people and all. Even Abbie was there, but she didn't talk. She was my height but much more pale than I am and her black hair was silky as it laid, undisturbed, and her shoulders. Even her eyes were dark. I had heard Allen was having some problems with Abbie. I really didn't see anything wrong with her.

"So, Ana, how are things at school?" Allen asked as he picked at his macaroni. I stopped picking at my food, hesitant at what to say. Should I tell him I recently busted this guy's nose? Or maybe the most recent one when I slammed some other guy into the lockers?

"I don't know seeing as I was forced to move and haven't started school yet." I saw my mom shoot me a glare from across the table. It was her warning telling me to shut up. I glanced at Abbie; she was pushing her food into neat piles instead of eating it.

"West, maybe you should take her to some parties with your friends? It'd be a good way for Ana to make some new ones." Allen didn't seem to take any offense to my smart-alic remark. I wasn't a party girl, so therefore I did not attend any parties. West let out a laugh. "Maybe even take her to the Mall of America?" Allen suggested.

"There aren't any that I know of anytime soon." Maybe West saw my reaction and pretended like there wasn't anything going on this weekend. Or there really might not be any. Whatever the case I was thankful for his answer. "But I can have Adrienne take her to the mall." He said the word mall with disgust in his voice. "I'm sure Wiscons here would like it." I turned my nose up at what he called me. Wiscons? Wiscons! What kind of nickname was that? It wasn't even the full word, Wisconsin, just Wiscons. I just hope that name doesn't catch on.

I ended up having to wash the dishes when everyone was finished. My mom volunteered me. She didn't want Allen to do it. Noooo, Ana had to do it. Ana would loove to do it...ugh.

And even thought they HAD A DISHWASHER I was the chosen one to scrape to extra food from the plates and wash them off BEFORE i put them in the dishwasher. What sense did that make? I mean a dishwasher was invented to wash your dishes so that people wouldn't have to do this by hand. It would have saved me more time to wash them myself rather than wash one, stick it in the dishwasher, wash another etc, and then wind up with annoying wrinkly hands. I mean really.

After I labored over the sink and a shower, I laid in bed but couldn't sleep. I was restless. My nerves jumped everywhere, and I couldn't find a comfortable position to lay. I concluded that I was worried about going to a new school the next day. Or maybe it was the fact that I would have to spend my eighteenth birthday in a place where I didn't know anyone. The reasons for my insomnia were endless and still unknown. My mind was cluttered with thoughts. Something was going on in my head to keep my eyes awake.

Tylenol PMs sounded really good right about now.

But, I later realized they weren't needed because suddenly I began to drift off to sleep. The weight of exhaustion pulled at my eyelids, and in my drowsy state I never noticed the light tapping at my bedroom window, nor did I care to notice.


Excerpt from next chapter:

I glanced over at Christian, and caught him looking as well. But he didn't do one of those girl maneuvers where he quickly looks away in embarrassment, no, he just stared at me, and it was really starting to piss me off. I could feel my anger building in my chest impatiently waiting to be released. And so I let it go.

"You got a problem, Christian?" I said loud enough to sound threatening. Out the corner of my eye I noticed West and Adrienne stop and look at me wide-eyed. "Because I'll fix it!." My fist began to ball up to where, what nails I had, could pierce my skin. I could almost imagine the bench rattling against the concrete along with my anger. Christian didn't seem intimidated, of course he wouldn't, he's a guy. But that look on his face pushed me over the edge and I felt my arm pull back and begin to swing.

That is, until West kicked me in the leg...