My teeth clattering in a rhythmic beat,

My body,


Beyond my control…


My stomach,

A lurching, hollow pit,




Whirling around in this cave,

Wanting to spill out with the remnants of what's left inside of me.


My heart beat,


Pounding and stopping,

Being indecisive,

On what its behavior is….


I put my cold,

Quaking hand,

Where my soul is placed,

In the location,

Where this has started,

Questioning why this is happening to me…


My voice,


I can't do my passionate singing,

Without taking intakes of cold, stale air,

It's discordant,

Making me fearful,

If I'll ever fully recover,

From this trembling…


Shiver down my spine,

Goosebumps up my arms,

These are the few things that I'd rather not have…


Biting my lip,

In nervousness,

Trying to stop this uncontrollable feeling,

That I'm experiencing…


Is this supposed to be a good feeling?

A feeling that I'm alleged to have?

Am I going to die right here and now?

Is this what it feels like?


All I know is that this doesn't feel right…


Has anyone ever felt this way?

Is it irregular?

Do I have condition?


I do everything in my power to fight it off,

Take deep,

Calming breaths,

Think about something else,

But I can't keep my mind off of you for long,

Because you make me so sunny,

Sing my heart out,

(Even though it's shaky now),

Scream into a pillow…


Unfortunately that doesn't work,

Doesn't get away this feeling,

The only thing that is the cure is time away from you,

But, I don't even want that,

I want to be closer to you,

Get this disease you're handing to me,

Into my trembling hands,

I take it,

And hold it close to me,

Because this is the most attention I've ever got,

And I appreciate it…


All that I know,

Is that I get this feeling now,

When I talk to you,

Or even think of you…


I want it desperately to go away,

Stop this killer disease of jitters,

Wish that it wisps away into the wind,

Like a secret untold,

But I welcome it,

Because maybe it's a good feeling…


All I know,



That I'm unstable.