Unstable

Trembling,

My teeth clattering in a rhythmic beat,

My body,

Shaking,

Beyond my control…

/0/

My stomach,

A lurching, hollow pit,

Flip-flopped,

Mix-matched,

Butterflies,

Whirling around in this cave,

Wanting to spill out with the remnants of what's left inside of me.

/0/

My heart beat,

Irregular,

Pounding and stopping,

Being indecisive,

On what its behavior is….

/0/

I put my cold,

Quaking hand,

Where my soul is placed,

In the location,

Where this has started,

Questioning why this is happening to me…

/0/

My voice,

Wavering,

I can't do my passionate singing,

Without taking intakes of cold, stale air,

It's discordant,

Making me fearful,

If I'll ever fully recover,

From this trembling…

/0/

Shiver down my spine,

Goosebumps up my arms,

These are the few things that I'd rather not have…

/0/

Biting my lip,

In nervousness,

Trying to stop this uncontrollable feeling,

That I'm experiencing…

/0/

Is this supposed to be a good feeling?

A feeling that I'm alleged to have?

Am I going to die right here and now?

Is this what it feels like?

/0/

All I know is that this doesn't feel right…

/0/

Has anyone ever felt this way?

Is it irregular?

Do I have condition?

/0/

I do everything in my power to fight it off,

Take deep,

Calming breaths,

Think about something else,

But I can't keep my mind off of you for long,

Because you make me so sunny,

Sing my heart out,

(Even though it's shaky now),

Scream into a pillow…

/0/

Unfortunately that doesn't work,

Doesn't get away this feeling,

The only thing that is the cure is time away from you,

But, I don't even want that,

I want to be closer to you,

Get this disease you're handing to me,

Into my trembling hands,

I take it,

And hold it close to me,

Because this is the most attention I've ever got,

And I appreciate it…

/0/

All that I know,

Is that I get this feeling now,

When I talk to you,

Or even think of you…

/0/

I want it desperately to go away,

Stop this killer disease of jitters,

Wish that it wisps away into the wind,

Like a secret untold,

But I welcome it,

Because maybe it's a good feeling…

/0/

All I know,

Is,

Now,

That I'm unstable.

Unstable.

……

U.n.s.t.a.b.l.e.