Chapter 4- The War Within Us...

"Within each individual's persona, there rage two different entities. On one side, there is the 'child' that strives to learn new things, to experience the world as if he would never have the opportunity to do so a second time, and to liberate the mind from its 'prison' of excessive rationality. On the other side, there is the bleak 'rationalist' that seeks to imprison the dreaming 'child'; to the rationalist, dreaming is self-deception. Would you rather be imprisoned or deceived?"

Dmitri Shostakovich

It had been three days since the professor taught me the legend behind the altar. Still, I seemed to be lost in a pool of confusion which had no end to its depth; apparently, I still had to undertake the task of reviving my own ability to dream before I could help others to do so. This was not easy to do; of course, I believed that the authoritarian government had destroyed the people's urge to imagine that the world could be better, but last night, I almost lost the drive to continue upon this journey. I didn't tell Professor Yevgeny, but last night, as I was preparing to fall asleep, I suddenly began to think pessimistically about this whole journey. What if this did not work? What if our painstaking efforts to liberate the nation actually did nothing more than 'imprison' us much more? In the end, it won't matter about our efforts; rather, it will be up to the people to pursue their own dreams...

After gathering our belongings and putting the fire out, we left the small cave that we had slept in the previous night and continued our journey. Luckily for us, though the temperature was frigid, the sun was shining brightly. Professor Yevgeny called this occurrence "освобождение", which means "liberation" in Russian. "I call it that because we, being the future 'liberators' of the glorious 'Motherland', are destined to BE liberated by such beautiful weather today! Helios surely smiles upon our efforts!" he said joyfully. Asides from the great weather, however, I believe that Yevgeny was implying that we were "liberated" from something else; but what is it? Besides the weather, what else could be 'imprisoning' us? Philosophers could be so vague sometimes...

That day seemed long and monotonous; it seemed that we traveled...and traveled...and traveled...and yet, it seemed that we weren't gaining any ground. Maybe Yevgeny was implying that we were bound in a perpetual "prison" of inclement weather; and yet, it also seemed that this idea of "moving yet never gaining ground" was a prevalent flaw in our country...

Eventually, the sun progressively stopped shining as brightly as before; it became darker by the hour, then by the minute, then every thirty seconds. As we further progressed into Siberia, we began to see decayed skeletons. We were truly entering the depths of the underworld itself. Of course, Siberia was the place where the government sent international prisoners; they simply flew them to the central part of the frozen wastelands and left them there. Though it is one of the most vile, unspeakable ways in which to punish an individual, it also tests an individual's will to live. It is reputed that if one was to reach the cities, then they would be free. But what right did the government have to determine whether one should live? And who or what could possibly "test" this authoritarian government's "will to exist"?

After passing a host of unfortunate prisoners, I looked at the sky and saw that it was pitch black. I knew that soon we would have to retire and resume the next day, but we were no where near a cave. But after about four minutes of walking, we came upon a camp. I was ecstatic about actually finding another party of humans in this harsh environment; Professor Yevgeny, however, was very vigilant.

As we came closer to the camp, we realized that it was a military camp; the inhabitants were Soviet soldiers. Immediately, I turned to the professor, who was also stunned. By the blank expression on his face, he obviously wasn't expecting these uninvited guests...

"Mikhail, this is a serious complication to our journey. It seems that we shall have to take a different path, thus negating the planning that I had put into this journey," I heard him blandly say. What did this mean? Are they following us? If so, why? If not, then why are they in the middle of the Siberian plains? The military doesn't normally come here unless by the air; however, I did not see any planes. They have to be following us...

"Mikhail, I believe that they have come to destroy the altar and the monuments. If they eradicate those ancient remnants, then they can further execute their propaganda of 'intellectual tyranny'," Professor Yevgeny said.

At that moment, that voice rang out again, and by the sudden smile on the professor's face, it was evident that Professor Yevgeny could understand exactly what the voice was saying, even though it was inside of me. Whose voice this was, I didn't know, but I heard it say: "If they have brought their soldiers to contain two unarmed people on a mission to liberate the people, then they must be mistaken. Who are they to think that they can bind the human intellect by destroying the monuments and the altar? The power to dream and think independently isn't within the altar or the "doorways"; it is within the people themselves. If they want to wage a physical war against two unarmed but intellectually-freed people, then there is no way that they can win the war within their own souls. There rages within each of us a war, in which the desires of the soul attempt to overcome the delusions of rationality. The soul's innermost desires always win; no government can place restrictions on the soul." I didn't know whose voice was ringing within my soul, but it made me realize one thing: I had won my inner "war", but it was up to me to help everyone else win this "battle" that rages within...