Scene 1

MARCO stands R on a semi-crowded bus, holding onto a handle above him. There are other people there, but they are imagined. LAURA is real, however, and sits in a seat facing audience UL of MARCO. LAURA wears a dress and "work" shoes. MARCO has slacks and a semicasual shirt.

MARCO: Looking at LAURA. Wow…She's…gorgeous. I want to date her and marry her and have two point five kids.

LAURA pulls cord. Door opening sound effect, and she exits the bus. Lights down.

MARCO: Oh, well.

Lights up. Same scene as beginning.

MARCO: Looking at LAURA. Wow…She's…gorgeous. I want to date her and marry her and have two point five kids. He takes a step towards LAURA. Excuse me…

LAURA looks up at him, they hold this pose for a moment, then rush into an embrace. Cut lights.

Scene 2

A fancy and romantic restaurant. LAURA and MARCO sit at a table C. LAURA is wearing same dress with "date" shoes, MARCO same pants with slightly more dressy shirt.

MARCO: So…

LAURA: Um…I like your tie.

MARCO: My roommate made me wear it.

LAURA: Oh. Pause.

MARCO: So…

LAURA: You have a roommate.

MARCO: Yeah.

LAURA: That's nice.

MARCO: Not really. She's always leaving her crap all over the place.

LAURA: She.

MARCO: Yeah.

LAURA: Oh. Pause.

MARCO: So… He waits, but she's not talking. Do you ride the bus a lot?

LAURA: Yeah.

MARCO: That's cool.

LAURA: Not really.

MARCO: You don't like riding the bus?

LAURA: No.

MARCO: Oh. Long pause.

MARCO: So…see you next Saturday?

LAURA: Of course. She stands.

MARCO: Why are we doing this? We have nothing in common.

LAURA: Shrugs. I don't know. You said-

MARCO: Wow…you're gorgeous. I want to date you and marry you and have two point five kids.

BOTH: Oh.

Lights fade.

Scene 3

The wedding chapel. MARCO and LAURA are DC, facing audience, as if at altar. LAURA wears same outfit and veil, MARCO adds jacket. LAURA has bouquet of flowers.

MARCO: Turns to LAURA. Wow…you're gorgeous. I want to date you and marry you and have two point five kids.

LAURA: Okay.

Lights out.

Lights up. Reception. Two white wicker chairs have appeared for the happy couple.

MARCO: Sitting. Glad lots of people showed up, huh?

LAURA: Sits. I hate my relatives.

MARCO: Sensing a breakthrough. Me too!

LAURA: Turns on him. Well, that's not very nice. I don't complain about your relatives.

MARCO: But…Sighs. Pause.

LAURA: The cake is nice.

MARCO: I wanted chocolate.

LAURA: I'm allergic.

MARCO: I know. Sighs. But-

LAURA: I know. I'm gorgeous. You want to date me and marry me and have two point five kids.

MARCO: Well, yes. No! No, I don't! Not really.

LAURA: Well, you said you did.

MARCO: Well, I didn't know it was going to turn out like this.

LAURA: Well, these things happen. Exits. MARCO looks after her helplessly. Lights down.

Scene 4

Hospital, maternity ward. LAURA is off right, MARCO is pacing. An uncomfortable-looking chair is DL. They are conversing.

MARCO: I still don't know how this happened, we sleep in separate beds!

LAURA: Yelling. You wanted this! You can't take it back now!

MARCO: But how in hell are we actually going to have two point five kids?

LAURA: How many times have I told you not to ask me!

MARCO sighs and flops into the uncomfortable chair.

MARCO: One statement. One stupid little observation. One little daydream.

Cut lights.

Scene 5

Same as first scene.

MARCO: Looking at LAURA. Wow…she's… gorgeous… Maybe I should talk to her…

LAURA pulls cord, door opening sound effect, she exits. MARCO sighs.

MARCO: Or maybe some things just aren't meant to be.